2 November 2006

MAX

Oh

My

God

Have barely had three hours sleep. Not sure I *could* sleep in the next three days I am so wired.

UNBELIEVABLE night, utterly unbelievable. Just so you know, better than ALL the Avanti parties AND the Leeds party. I kid you NOT. You can even throw the last few Slug nights in and it still wouldn't reach the guilty pleasures of last night.

You are going to be SO friggin' proud of me.

The best bit ever, ever, ever? When 'I like the way you move' came on, he unbuttoned his shirt for me - and that was the second time in the night.

I don't need to sleep? SLEEP? Christ, I'd be wasting valuable remembering time.

JESUS CHRIST.

And I haven't even STARTED on the rest of the boys, who asked me out,
the random pickups ...

OH MY GOD.

BEING SOBER IS A WONDERFUL THING
To 13 friends, and that’s just half of the girls who got this email

Ladies

Thank you all variously for listening to me rabbit on and on and ON about my obsession with the young man in the last six weeks.

Last night the Final Year Dinner started at 5.30pm and kicked on until he, another girl and I were the last on the dancefloor at 3am this morning (please DO not ask where we were, I think you have ALL heard of the Hip-E Club, yes?)

In between was a party that was the perfect example of why I do not drink, NEVER has it paid off more to be sober: it beat the Rugby team, the Avanti parties, the Leeds party AND all the nights at the Slug and Lettuce into a whimpering heap.

The photos WILL be following, trust me, I won't be able to help myself.

Now I have to calm my over-simulated nerves - you have all seen me completely wired at one time or another, so you know how I am probably looking at the moment - and go to work and try to keep THAT grin off my face.

I just spent three hours trying to sleep and not dream ... what productivity lies ahead today!

Claire 'I got asked out by the wrong man last night, amongst other hilarious stories' Bowen

ROBBIE

all i can say is 'brilliant- absolutely brilliant!'

now to put yr paper behind u and then work on the boy ...

looking forward to the pictures … and the stories … and yr giggling ...

MAX

Photos attached!

There are two more cameras of photos that I need to get my hands on ... there is the photo of me and him together (two times only) on his camera and I want those photos goddamnit.

RHYS

Okay max - I have to admit, the previous photos of your lust did not serve him justice.  But these ones certainly did. The clit tickler is a good look for him and the boy dresses well … bring on December :-)

MAX

8-) wow! you and Che both have said they can see what I am going on about now. Both of you are kinda hard to impress with men.

He drives me crazy *sigh* And it is no help that he is utterly charming and lovely. HE IS KILLING ME - and it would appear, all the other girls too :(

The thing about Wednesday night is that I am putting out the deadline of something happening to way past December. The only reason the night was successful for me was because I was the ONLY girl in that group not chasing him.

THE NIGHT

During dinner at the Royal Perth Yacht Club, I was squired around for five hours by Tad, the impossible crush.

On Wednesday his friend Megan would find us each hour and tell us we must stop flirting. He is an astonishing boy Rhys, so very gallant, a real gentleman.

Young man was well behaved and we were very discreet when we talked. Well, I was anyway. I had to walk away a few times to get him to shut up.

Then the party relocated to Niche and things hotted up. EVERY girl there was trying to pin young man down to picking one of them, and he was VERY good at keeping them all at exactly the same level, the 'he would if he could, but he's not, but keep hoping' level. The boy is very good, but there was still a catfight. Thankfully while that was happening I was being chatted up by the General Manager and PR Manager of the Ford Racing Team in town for the Rally. They tried to hire me to join their team for NZ!

While I was chatting away to the top blond Brit totty the boys were asking if I wanted a drink every five minutes. Then I introduced them to the two Brits and watch their eyes widen with respect. Heh. I am so evil, fast cars always impress young boys.

And the boys in the class? Well, they were after me. I was demanded in every photo and in the end I was getting kisses. THEN I was asked out and things got really interesting. The effect of new women in a close-knit group I think.

It was only yesterday when I was looking back at the photos and what I remembered that it struck me that young man and I had been in direct competition all night. He had the girls in the palm of his hand, I was working my way through a line of the boys. He talked to some girls that were NOT from the group and the girls glared. I talked to men who were not part of the group and I had a string of boys trying to cut in.

And then there was the shirt thing. I never stirred a foot in his direction all night, he had to come to me. And when he did he did various things that seem bizarre in the light of day, but were so
goddamn sexy at the time I was in pain:

#1 'Max, look, I was in the gym this morning, do you think it did any good?' proffers his fabulous arms for my touch - I refused.

#2 'Max, look, I don't have as much body hair as the boys over there' proffers his whole body for my inspection - I refused.

#3 Third time lucky he actually undid ALL the buttons on his shirt. I cannot for the life of me remember what prompted this impromptu floorshow for me, mainly because the sight of that chest wiped me out entirely. I couldn't look for fear of losing all brain function with lust.

#4 Second strip show in the middle of the Hip-E. This time I know what prompted it and, well, let's just say he acts on direct orders from me to strip. I was still unable to actually look when the chest appeared. Drooling is not very ladylike.

And then I started getting into my dancing groove and he was left to protect Megha and I from the Hip-E predators. Then we went to get kebabs and we went home - separately.

LESSON LEARNT

I am not stirring a foot towards him - it is imperative that I not chase him in any way - the only way I am going to even get into the race is to let him do ALL the moves. And I am pretty fine with that now that I have seen how he deals with girls. It's just something a boy that hot and lovely gets, so I have to make sure I manage him right.

So I am pretty much in for the long haul now. It's going to be an interesting summer! :)

Essays beckon!

TOM

you and him almost look like you could be brother and sister in that photo. Oops prob shouldnt have pointed that out, now you might get turned off a bit!!

hows the essay going? finished it yet?

RHYS

if only you could submit this as your essay *the email* ;-)  This was a most  enjoyable email to open up go through. hahah - I find it hard to believe  that I am hard to impress :-P

All I can say is why wait until the end of summer for something you can  enjoy now :-)

It was very amusing to see his little head appearing in all of the pictures … It would have been good for a topless picture to be emailed … something to work on there :-)

That was very amusing that Tad has a mini-you girlfriend. The question is though did he start dating her before or after meeting you....

I am enjoying hearing about my single friends love lifes

Enjoy your dancing … (I like that term)

MAX

Who is Who:

Him - the one *I* want
Goran - the one who asked me out
Stuart - from Brighton, apparently the boys love the fact that he 'fancies' me, Aussie boys have never heard that phrase ...
Dan - is an utter legend, here he is looking for boobs and not finding them on me!
Alex - VERY hot, very hot indeed.
Jonathon - nicknamed 'The Hess' by the boys, they say he is the boy that gets ALL the girls all the time.
Filip - SO hot I usually can't speak in his presence.
Tad - his girlfriend is a clone of me, needless to say we get along very well.

Put in your orders ...

MAX

:) How BIG is my grin?

What a great night!

Tad was definitely going out with Claire for AGES before he met me! They are off to Europe together in twenty days, bless 'em.

Alex came in today looking VERY fly to give me his photos and he was teasing me for 'getting around' with all the boys and I just looked very smug and oogled him when he wasn't looking - there are so many hot boys around at the moment *sigh* It's a hard life.

/-)

MAX

last update for your entertainment - and yes, I know they are jailbait *sigh*

RHYS

your grin is incredibly big.
I must say Bell -  do not cut your hair, it has great feng shui going on at  the moment and it really suits you with that length.

I must away - got a plane to catch and things to see.

xxooo speak to you upon my return.

MAX

HAVE A GREAT TIME DOLL! :)

OH

MY

GOD

I am so excited for you, business class, Europe - fark it is going to be so much fun! :)

I am LOVING myself SICK in the long hair, no cutting will be entered into at all.

REDHEADED FORMER CRUSH

hey babe
hows things? and now down to business...
quick question did you got to Turkey for Anzac day? if so did you use a  tour operator? and which one?

MAX

THINGS ARE BRILLIANT! :)

Just got in at 3am after kicking on with the Civil Engineering Final Year students after their Final Year Dinner. Nothing like being comprehensively 'tuned' by 15 HOT 22 year olds in one night - it must be some kind of record or something - being admin has it's perks, oh yes.

I did go to Turkey for Anzac. I went with a Turkish tour group of Law students organised by the Turkish friends of my friend Kim. It was unreal, going with the Turks is fantastic. If you want an incredible experience, I can find out if Koray is running it again this year ...

Man, gotta go download my trophy photos and actually pretend to do work today - boys are such fun!

REDHEADED FORMER CRUSH

nice one! you dirty stop out, taking advantage of all those young boys, good  on you! ha ha.

what else is happening at your end? we're al booked in for New Years in New  York, cant wait! the weather has snapped cold, here comes winter! i love  wearing coats and jackets!

yeah ask your friend about Anzac, that'd be cool, i might have a whole bunch  of people (between 5-10), i really wont to avoid using those horrendous tour  operators!

MAX

What else is new? Weeeeeell ...

You are the only boy getting to see these photos ... mainly because you were emailing me at the time of the biggest development in the saga :)

The story is that young man - the boy in most of the photos - is one of my students and has been chasing me, GOD knows why, for about four months now. I have been a GOOD girl and kept my hands off him though.

All my girlfriends have heard the stories, and this little album was created from photos from the Wednesday night Final Year Dinner so they could see who I have been obsessed with keeping calm around for the last four months.

New Years in New York - hell that will be a party!

I will see if I can get you in touch with the boys in Turkey ...

Max 'Grabby McHotyoungbuns' Bell

REDHEADED FORMER CRUSH

is it just me or does this young man look like Shannon Noll circa Australian  Idol?

MAX

*cue hysterical laughter*

Yup. That is his nickname in his class, in the class below him, and the class below THAT.

My girlfriends call him Blair from Neighbours/Big Brother.

I just call him HOTTIE.

REDHEADED FORMER CRUSH

oh yeah blair for sure! ha ha you craddle snatcher! i bet your teaching him  all kinds of things.

MAX

bless yer - not yet! He is still covered by duty of care *damn*

I am angling to teach him stuff! :)

and cradlesnatching is ALL the rage right now. If Demi and Cameron are doing it ..?

MAX

First picture

Goran – the one who asked me out. He was the only sober one last night as he was driving. I don't know what to think about it, he would be great to date, knows how to treat a girl. Croatian. Very Eastern European Mafia *shrug* it would be good for a nice dinner!

Tad – the one with the lovely girlfriend called Claire *sigh* He is utterly lovely that boy. He was such a gentleman all night. I have an unfulfillable crush on him.

Matt – oh my GOD did we bond last night. Amazing boy, I hope we get to be Queens buddies.

Second picture

Jonathon – the Saffa who reads the same Fantasy Books as me, the boys were SOOOOO nervous each time he came near me!

Third picture

Him. Yes. The man is hawt.

Filip is the one next to Tim. I can't speak to Filip without tuning out his inane chatter and just oozing all over his chest. Incredible body.

Fourth picture

Some predatory slapper out for all the top totty she could get her wandering hands on! :)

Great night. Hopefully more pictorial evidence of Max and young men coming my way via the boys ...

Hope you are having a good day and are not too tired

ROBBIE

hya- had a quick look at the pics at your final year dinner- i must say your lad looks shockingly like Blair from Neighbours (who was 'discovered' on the 1st season of that crapola show Big Brother). Anyway- looks like YOU Max had a ball- perhaps more to be had in due time … wink wink.

As for the slapper that's after him- if she's a friend of yours I apologise ahead of time, but as she is no friend of mine, I can say in all honesty that she be right at home at the stables … neigh.

love robbie (who only like babies of the non-human kind)

MAX

*grin*

Just shows our ages really Robbie - we think Blair from Neighbours, his classmates call him Shannon Noll.

I did have a ball actually - nothing like acres of 22 year olds trying to snog you. Not to mention the HOT British PR manager of the Ford Racing Team (in town for the Rally) with his East London geezer accent. 'So, will you stop talking if I snog you' in that accent is SO effective!

Ah, she is not a slapper, she is just young and silly :)

M

Ummm....

Would I be the first person to make the Shannon Noll connection? I just can't help myself, every time I see that little piece of half-fuzz :)

I mean ... LOOK:  http://www.shannonnoll.com.au

Eh? Eh???

*nudges you*

Maybe he's signed up to ASIO in the last round of recruitment and his cover is that of an Irish engineering student nestled deep in the hotbed of dissent that is UWA.

I think I'm on to something here, I really do.

Thing is, though, looking through the photos it seems that you have your pick of guys there - swimming in them, you are. If I sent you a photo of the men that I work with, you'd lose your lunch. Office of over 500 staff - not a handsome one in sight, not even if you drink quite a bit and squint furiously.

MAX

*grin*

Amongst the girls, it is a dead heat between Shannon Noll and Blair from Neighbours / Big Brother. I think it is pretty funny actually because I wouldn't know Shannon Noll if I fell over him, so I really can't see it.

Your lack of handsome men, even after two lots of beer goggles one on top of another, is pretty sad luv. I had ALL the boys in to say a sheepish hello this week and DAMN they are fine lads.

Want to know something mortifying though? I showed Elbow some photos last night and she saw the attached photos and gave a shriek ... she immediately recognised one of them, Trinity classmate of Timbon and Cathedral Choirboy whom Elbow and I have known since he was about 8. Problem is the last time I saw Choirboy was when he was fourteen, and because I was not Elbow and did not have a crush on him, I never knew his name.

I was speechless with horror - all those pecks on the cheek, the vaguely saucy emails in the last week, OH MY GOD I'M CORRUPTING A CHOIRBOY! And even worse, I am *sure* he knows who I am. Gawd. I tell you what, I am going to that SPECIAL, SPECIAL hell.

I'm not sure I should even go to work tomorrow, things are getting stupid :(

I hope you are having just normal, non-jailbait times this week ...