Archie: Didn't you get to do enough cooking on Woody Island?
Max: A girl's cooking is NEVER done! :)
Archie: Give me a scullery maid and I'd have to agree with you. I just hate washing up, especially when others do nothing to help and then expect to be able to eat it all.
Max: I would KILL for my own personal scullery maid! That would be awesome. My life is minionless at the moment without a scullery maid. I reckon Robbie would make a very fetching scullery maid ... :)
Archie: Oh, how divine an idea :) I hope she won't mind. No the person I wish demoted to the position of scullery maid has a reputation at odds with the job. And she'd only ever wash up once in a blue moon rather than when it was required of her.
Max: N'ah, I reckon she'd do it if I have RA as the Kitchen Boy - they would have to sleep in the cinders together under the roasting meat. That'll get her on board.
Archie: i think you'd have more luck with DL as the kitchen boy. I think he's a fave at the moment because of Life. And if he's your servant ...
Max: DL to get Arthur as a maid, RA to get Robbie as a maid. Maybe Arthur to get Robbie as a maid and DL and RA can be my 'bedmates'. Yeeeeeees.
Archie: But how much work are they likely to do with RA or DL or even FP in the kitchen with them?
Max: There will be shenanigans for sure, but I think both Arthur and Robbie would understand which side their bread is buttered (because otherwise, that is all the food they are getting) and put in the hours in the suds :)
Archie: you have such faith … but then you'd have more chance of getting them to work than I ever would.
Max: I have an 'I Run The Kitchen' attitude now, so you may be right. My mother has started saying things like 'well, we better get out of the kitchen because MAX is in there and SHE likes things cooked THIS way.' I am quite a bit less accommodating now I have had a taste of running a kitchen. The Queen Bee has finally shown up for 2008! :)
Archie: *tsk* *tsk* the real test will be in the kitchen with me. Is the Queen B getting too big for her boots? And is she here to stay? I'm quite prepared to demote you to second cook should it prove necessary. :)
Max: Well, I think we shall have to find out eh? When it comes to extreme cooking and running a kitchen, I think my week of catering sets me up as stiff competition ...
Wednesday, November 20, 2019
Tuesday, November 19, 2019
19 November 2013
Going to dinner with two Coalition Voters and Supporters who are related to me this week. The topics of conversation I will raise will be Asylum Seekers and Climate Change. It will probably be horrific
Friend: Good luck!
Three years of talking to Coalition Supporters and Voters to help them work through their shame that they were taken in by Coalition Policies is going to be hard but necessary work to ensure this Government gets kicked out at the next election
Friend: It just gets worse and worse and worse … And we're only a week in :(
Max: If you had told me two weeks ago what he would do last week, I would have told you to re-write your script, because no one, not even him, could be so very, very awful
But we know what we have to do - we have to talk to the people that support the Government and change their minds. My parents are not going to like being around me for the next three years ... but I can't stand silent and put myself on the wrong side of history
Friend: Yeah there may/may not be some reflection in my next show... And then I think it's time I dusted off my copies of boal!
There is something about the Australian Government at the moment that reminds me of all the governments of history that are held up as the worst of the worst. Except with this Government, people I actually know voted for them, and still support them to my face.
This action, and many other actions of this Goverment, is regressive. But this is the reality of being politically progressive and not having the guts to talk to the Coalition Supporters and Voters about their support of the Government and their fear of admitting they supported and voted for a Government that has turned out to be evil.
The people who support this Government are alive, still supporting them and they are people you know. They are the people that need to be talked to, over and over and over again by progressives until they understand that they must not support evil because they are scared of admitting they were taken in by Coalition Policy.
Talk to the Coalition Supports and Voters you know, without fear, for three years, or this madness continues.
Friend: Good luck!
Three years of talking to Coalition Supporters and Voters to help them work through their shame that they were taken in by Coalition Policies is going to be hard but necessary work to ensure this Government gets kicked out at the next election
Friend: It just gets worse and worse and worse … And we're only a week in :(
Max: If you had told me two weeks ago what he would do last week, I would have told you to re-write your script, because no one, not even him, could be so very, very awful
But we know what we have to do - we have to talk to the people that support the Government and change their minds. My parents are not going to like being around me for the next three years ... but I can't stand silent and put myself on the wrong side of history
Friend: Yeah there may/may not be some reflection in my next show... And then I think it's time I dusted off my copies of boal!
There is something about the Australian Government at the moment that reminds me of all the governments of history that are held up as the worst of the worst. Except with this Government, people I actually know voted for them, and still support them to my face.
This action, and many other actions of this Goverment, is regressive. But this is the reality of being politically progressive and not having the guts to talk to the Coalition Supporters and Voters about their support of the Government and their fear of admitting they supported and voted for a Government that has turned out to be evil.
The people who support this Government are alive, still supporting them and they are people you know. They are the people that need to be talked to, over and over and over again by progressives until they understand that they must not support evil because they are scared of admitting they were taken in by Coalition Policy.
Talk to the Coalition Supports and Voters you know, without fear, for three years, or this madness continues.
19 November 2007
DEAN
Hola miss, I meant to mail u last week to thank u for brightening up my lunch hour!! :) what do u think about breaking your no-drinks ban and going out for a drink (ethanol influenced) soon???!!
x
Ps. Actually, that's unfair, u don't have to drink if u don't want to...
MAX
'Twas my pleasure, as always. I enjoy thinking aloud to you, you always have such a great perspective on things. I will be up for a drink, let's make it a watering hole with plenty of people to laugh at hmmmm? And thank you for being the first person in a very long time to be thoughtful enough to say I don't HAVE to drink! You would be surprised how many people don't think to remember. Not this weekend, but next ... mayhaps a Friday night? We could go stalking Lawyers or something ... :)
I am working at the Medical Board of Western Australia for a week and all the Med graduates are coming through to register. Fresh, young meat. Trying not to get itchy fingers :) How was your weekend?
DEAN
next friday night sounds like a very good idea :)
maybe perth, like one of the drinks strip along hay/ murray street, or the subi hotel? :)
oh yeah ... and my lil brother may be one of those med graduates. he starts at sir charles gardner 2008, but he wont be coming through for awhile ... haha ... you're terrible, muriel!! :) easy, tiger :)
x
Hola miss, I meant to mail u last week to thank u for brightening up my lunch hour!! :) what do u think about breaking your no-drinks ban and going out for a drink (ethanol influenced) soon???!!
x
Ps. Actually, that's unfair, u don't have to drink if u don't want to...
MAX
'Twas my pleasure, as always. I enjoy thinking aloud to you, you always have such a great perspective on things. I will be up for a drink, let's make it a watering hole with plenty of people to laugh at hmmmm? And thank you for being the first person in a very long time to be thoughtful enough to say I don't HAVE to drink! You would be surprised how many people don't think to remember. Not this weekend, but next ... mayhaps a Friday night? We could go stalking Lawyers or something ... :)
I am working at the Medical Board of Western Australia for a week and all the Med graduates are coming through to register. Fresh, young meat. Trying not to get itchy fingers :) How was your weekend?
DEAN
next friday night sounds like a very good idea :)
maybe perth, like one of the drinks strip along hay/ murray street, or the subi hotel? :)
oh yeah ... and my lil brother may be one of those med graduates. he starts at sir charles gardner 2008, but he wont be coming through for awhile ... haha ... you're terrible, muriel!! :) easy, tiger :)
x
19 November 2004
There are weeks when nothing much happens and weeks when each day is a MINI adventure – these last few weeks was definitely brought to you by the letters G and R and the number 8 … a great time had by all!
Friday 12 November
I went to another Avanti party at which many things happened:
- the English architects finally cracked out of their shells and beamed when they saw me. They are such funny creatures
- I acquired more bad dancing Germans to go out clubbing with
- Teddy was left in doubt as to my intentions and I left him at the end of the night with no satisfaction but a certain glazed look on his face that may have been caused by thoughts of sex. Sometimes I am as subtle as a train wreck and it WORKS! :)
Saturday 13 November
I was at one of the most famous clubs in London, Tiger Tiger, for Tom's birthday bash;
I put on layers and layers of Elizabeth Arden makeup and looked rather foxy. M and M were so impressed they got out the camera to capture the amazing transformation. When I got to Tiger Tiger I went hoarse from growling "Move the FUCK along, mate" to the men that glanced at me and decided I was too pretty to let go past. I hate meat markets! Tiger Tiger was vast and an impressive pickup joint but I am just too old for that kind of stuff. Tom and I stumbled out the door at 2am and Sister and Wifey had just arrived to start their night. So Tom went home and us three hung out in Leicester Square – Sister and Wifey eating hamburgers and me fending off a group of remarkably determined Indian boys.
*Max, Sister and Wifey in line for a hamburger*
*Group of Indian guys spot Max*
1st Boy: Hi, I'm Sexy, what's your name?
Max: Sheila
2nd Boy: Hi Sheila, I'm Dead Sexy.
*Sheila, Sister and Wifey walk outside*
*Sexy and Dead Sexy follow (btw these names are the ones they gave themselves, no relation to their actual looks)*
Sexy: Sheila, will you go out with me?
Sheila: No
Dead Sexy: Girls, why won't she go out with Sexy? Who are you girls anyway?
Sister: Sara
Wifey: Matthew
*Sexy and Dead Sexy do not bat an eyelid. They continue bantering, I continue to refuse my admirers*
*Sexy Beast and Scrooge, their friends, arrive. Scrooge has a comb-over. Sexy Beast is damn fine*
*Sheila, Sara and Matthew perk up at Sexy Beast's arrival*
*Sexy renews his attentions to Sheila*
Sexy: Can I have your number?
Sheila: No
Sexy: Can I give you my number?
Sheila: No.
*repeat many more times and rinse*
Sheila (after about 20 minutes of being a complete bitch): Well, guys, we have to go. Thanks for the entertainment.
*Sheila shakes hands with Sexy and Sexy Beast*
Sexy: PLEASE TAKE MY NUMBER!
Sheila: No
Sexy Beast (smiling confidently and smoothly as he leans down from his broad-shouldered height and flashes bright green eyes with lush black lashes): So, can *I* have your number.
*Sheila is tempted but feels the satisfaction of refusing will outweigh the potential pleasure of being caught*
Sheila: Nup.
Great night :)
THEN we were entertained by a group of very pretty but excessively drunk Spanish boys who decided that I had beer in my bag that I had to share immediately.
Right then boys. We ran away :)
Sunday 14 November
I went to the Natural History Museum to watch a young, nerdy but rather hot Fish Curator with lovely hands talk about fishy stuff, saw the very awesome Wildlife Photographer of the Year exhibition complete with action shot of a baby penguin pooing (gotta love that penguin fixation – photo available on application to your correspondent) and finished off the day with 8 friends in an empty cinema to watch our own private viewing of a film on the Iraqi war.
Monday 15 November
I went to the National Film Theatre to indulge in a black and white classic, The Women, with bitchiness the agenda for the film and the immortal line 'There is a name for you ladies – but it is not used in polite society outside the kennel.'
Tuesday 16 November
Wifey scored free tickets to the dress rehearsal of the English National Orchestra and so we rocked up with men in tow. The men were my darling friend Joel, whom I turned down in Year 12 to go out with *cough* Colin Barnet's son *cough*, and his mate Simon who is currently going out with Wifey since Joel and I introduced them five weeks ago during Joel's first stay in London. Joel had only got in from Geneva two hours before so he was feeling very cosmopolitan. The opera itself was in English, was spectacularly staged and really, REALLY raunchy! The lead female was totally naked on stage for about 20 seconds in FULL VIEW and the chorus seriously got it on with each other all over the stage at one point! It was shocking, it was titillating and it was everything I wasn't expecting from Opera! :)
Wednesday 17 November
I went down to Wimbledon to have more birthday celebrations with Tom (her real birthday) and was lucky enough to be sitting next to two young English strippers on the train who were comparing breast implant scars ...
Friday 19 November
Moss had a last-minute ticket to see Amy Winehouse at the Brixton Academy and so I got to catch her last night. For a 19-year-old who debuted to huge acclaim 12 months ago, Amy was a great show. I don't know if you guys have had any of her singles over there, but she has an amazing Jazz voice and is nowhere near as pretty as you expect most pop starlets to be. She has a huge nose, nice boobs and amazing legs – so she strutted onto the stage in a TINY sky blue baby doll dress and all the guys in the audience nearly spontaneously combusted! She was an incredibly engaging performer, combining genuine talent with the amazing ability to sing each song as if it still meant the world to her; being able to dance badly and merely make you feel that you just happened to be in her bedroom while she was singing her favourite song and dancing dorkily.
Friday 12 November
I went to another Avanti party at which many things happened:
- the English architects finally cracked out of their shells and beamed when they saw me. They are such funny creatures
- I acquired more bad dancing Germans to go out clubbing with
- Teddy was left in doubt as to my intentions and I left him at the end of the night with no satisfaction but a certain glazed look on his face that may have been caused by thoughts of sex. Sometimes I am as subtle as a train wreck and it WORKS! :)
Saturday 13 November
I was at one of the most famous clubs in London, Tiger Tiger, for Tom's birthday bash;
I put on layers and layers of Elizabeth Arden makeup and looked rather foxy. M and M were so impressed they got out the camera to capture the amazing transformation. When I got to Tiger Tiger I went hoarse from growling "Move the FUCK along, mate" to the men that glanced at me and decided I was too pretty to let go past. I hate meat markets! Tiger Tiger was vast and an impressive pickup joint but I am just too old for that kind of stuff. Tom and I stumbled out the door at 2am and Sister and Wifey had just arrived to start their night. So Tom went home and us three hung out in Leicester Square – Sister and Wifey eating hamburgers and me fending off a group of remarkably determined Indian boys.
*Max, Sister and Wifey in line for a hamburger*
*Group of Indian guys spot Max*
1st Boy: Hi, I'm Sexy, what's your name?
Max: Sheila
2nd Boy: Hi Sheila, I'm Dead Sexy.
*Sheila, Sister and Wifey walk outside*
*Sexy and Dead Sexy follow (btw these names are the ones they gave themselves, no relation to their actual looks)*
Sexy: Sheila, will you go out with me?
Sheila: No
Dead Sexy: Girls, why won't she go out with Sexy? Who are you girls anyway?
Sister: Sara
Wifey: Matthew
*Sexy and Dead Sexy do not bat an eyelid. They continue bantering, I continue to refuse my admirers*
*Sexy Beast and Scrooge, their friends, arrive. Scrooge has a comb-over. Sexy Beast is damn fine*
*Sheila, Sara and Matthew perk up at Sexy Beast's arrival*
*Sexy renews his attentions to Sheila*
Sexy: Can I have your number?
Sheila: No
Sexy: Can I give you my number?
Sheila: No.
*repeat many more times and rinse*
Sheila (after about 20 minutes of being a complete bitch): Well, guys, we have to go. Thanks for the entertainment.
*Sheila shakes hands with Sexy and Sexy Beast*
Sexy: PLEASE TAKE MY NUMBER!
Sheila: No
Sexy Beast (smiling confidently and smoothly as he leans down from his broad-shouldered height and flashes bright green eyes with lush black lashes): So, can *I* have your number.
*Sheila is tempted but feels the satisfaction of refusing will outweigh the potential pleasure of being caught*
Sheila: Nup.
Great night :)
THEN we were entertained by a group of very pretty but excessively drunk Spanish boys who decided that I had beer in my bag that I had to share immediately.
Right then boys. We ran away :)
I went to the Natural History Museum to watch a young, nerdy but rather hot Fish Curator with lovely hands talk about fishy stuff, saw the very awesome Wildlife Photographer of the Year exhibition complete with action shot of a baby penguin pooing (gotta love that penguin fixation – photo available on application to your correspondent) and finished off the day with 8 friends in an empty cinema to watch our own private viewing of a film on the Iraqi war.
Monday 15 November
I went to the National Film Theatre to indulge in a black and white classic, The Women, with bitchiness the agenda for the film and the immortal line 'There is a name for you ladies – but it is not used in polite society outside the kennel.'
Tuesday 16 November
Wifey scored free tickets to the dress rehearsal of the English National Orchestra and so we rocked up with men in tow. The men were my darling friend Joel, whom I turned down in Year 12 to go out with *cough* Colin Barnet's son *cough*, and his mate Simon who is currently going out with Wifey since Joel and I introduced them five weeks ago during Joel's first stay in London. Joel had only got in from Geneva two hours before so he was feeling very cosmopolitan. The opera itself was in English, was spectacularly staged and really, REALLY raunchy! The lead female was totally naked on stage for about 20 seconds in FULL VIEW and the chorus seriously got it on with each other all over the stage at one point! It was shocking, it was titillating and it was everything I wasn't expecting from Opera! :)
Wednesday 17 November
I went down to Wimbledon to have more birthday celebrations with Tom (her real birthday) and was lucky enough to be sitting next to two young English strippers on the train who were comparing breast implant scars ...
Friday 19 November
Moss had a last-minute ticket to see Amy Winehouse at the Brixton Academy and so I got to catch her last night. For a 19-year-old who debuted to huge acclaim 12 months ago, Amy was a great show. I don't know if you guys have had any of her singles over there, but she has an amazing Jazz voice and is nowhere near as pretty as you expect most pop starlets to be. She has a huge nose, nice boobs and amazing legs – so she strutted onto the stage in a TINY sky blue baby doll dress and all the guys in the audience nearly spontaneously combusted! She was an incredibly engaging performer, combining genuine talent with the amazing ability to sing each song as if it still meant the world to her; being able to dance badly and merely make you feel that you just happened to be in her bedroom while she was singing her favourite song and dancing dorkily.
Monday, November 18, 2019
18 November 2010
Max is rugging up for Hogwarts tonight
Cousin's Husband: I thought we were at Hogwarts last night?! :D
Max: Oh GAWD, good call, but it was HOTwarts last night ...
Cousin's Husband: Oh nice play on words … I'm impressed! BUT … just how hot are warts really? seriously?
Max: More like if you touched one of the hot kids, you'd get warts. Whether that is normal warts or magical warts depends on the strength of the 'paedophile' spell on the kid ...
Cousin's Husband: I felt dirty just being there ... people kept asking me how I grew facial hair
Max: I kept on being mistaken for the Teacher in charge of the school outing ...
Cousin's Husband: Must have been the naughty teacher's outfit you were wearing
Max: And I do think that ONLY wearing your beard was slightly inappropriate, though that one girl liked what you had done with the ... carpet ...
Cousin's Husband: I thought we were at Hogwarts last night?! :D
Max: Oh GAWD, good call, but it was HOTwarts last night ...
Cousin's Husband: Oh nice play on words … I'm impressed! BUT … just how hot are warts really? seriously?
Max: More like if you touched one of the hot kids, you'd get warts. Whether that is normal warts or magical warts depends on the strength of the 'paedophile' spell on the kid ...
Cousin's Husband: I felt dirty just being there ... people kept asking me how I grew facial hair
Max: I kept on being mistaken for the Teacher in charge of the school outing ...
Cousin's Husband: Must have been the naughty teacher's outfit you were wearing
Max: And I do think that ONLY wearing your beard was slightly inappropriate, though that one girl liked what you had done with the ... carpet ...
18 November 2009
Max would like to have someone rubbed out before Friday
Friend: i know a guy who knows a guy who might know a guy ...
Archie: I'd like to take the rare opportunity to be the good angel sitting on your right shoulder and return the advice you've often offered me: Karma's a bitch
Max: Friend, I need to talk to him
Archie, not for me, for someone else. Also - Croquembouche on Masterchef next week! eeee!
Elbow: We are planning *clap* we, we are planning *clap* we are planning!
Friend: i’ll ask for his number ...
Elbow: Thanks friend who I don't know ... or do I? You're helping me out greatly. After this, we shall be the greatest of friends
Max: He is a god-fearing man who is obviously fine with bending certain commandments for justice. We salute you, my Friend ...
Friend: bend commandments? i thought you just needed an eraser. the guy just works at a stationery store ...
Archie: you're not trying to rub out your younger sister are you?... though I wholeheartedly agree with the general principle
Max: Actually, both Elbow and I agree that we must dispose of this person with extreme prejudice. So an eraser may just be for starters ...
Friend in London: Bargain deal for friends. Only £500. Send cheque + details by post. Delivery 1-week maximum
Friend: i know a guy who knows a guy who might know a guy ...
Archie: I'd like to take the rare opportunity to be the good angel sitting on your right shoulder and return the advice you've often offered me: Karma's a bitch
Max: Friend, I need to talk to him
Archie, not for me, for someone else. Also - Croquembouche on Masterchef next week! eeee!
Elbow: We are planning *clap* we, we are planning *clap* we are planning!
Friend: i’ll ask for his number ...
Elbow: Thanks friend who I don't know ... or do I? You're helping me out greatly. After this, we shall be the greatest of friends
Max: He is a god-fearing man who is obviously fine with bending certain commandments for justice. We salute you, my Friend ...
Friend: bend commandments? i thought you just needed an eraser. the guy just works at a stationery store ...
Archie: you're not trying to rub out your younger sister are you?... though I wholeheartedly agree with the general principle
Max: Actually, both Elbow and I agree that we must dispose of this person with extreme prejudice. So an eraser may just be for starters ...
Friend in London: Bargain deal for friends. Only £500. Send cheque + details by post. Delivery 1-week maximum
18 November 2009
There is a long story and a short story ...
The short story is that I did my Honours Thesis in 2007 and it killed my ability to write without referencing each sentence :(
The long story is that I only ever wrote from life, usually when it was boring. I now have a frantically exciting life and writing about it bores me because it is a pretty specific lifestyle ...
I am a theatrical agent now and I spend three nights a week in the theatre and at showbiz parties. It sounds exciting, but only for me, retelling the stories of the endless partying is a cross between bragging and name-dropping, so I don't like to do it
I am starting an exercise though to get back into writing - it will not be nearly as political as it got before my thesis, but hopefully it will warm up and be interesting
The short story is that I did my Honours Thesis in 2007 and it killed my ability to write without referencing each sentence :(
The long story is that I only ever wrote from life, usually when it was boring. I now have a frantically exciting life and writing about it bores me because it is a pretty specific lifestyle ...
I am a theatrical agent now and I spend three nights a week in the theatre and at showbiz parties. It sounds exciting, but only for me, retelling the stories of the endless partying is a cross between bragging and name-dropping, so I don't like to do it
I am starting an exercise though to get back into writing - it will not be nearly as political as it got before my thesis, but hopefully it will warm up and be interesting
18 November 2005
No one can escape me on google …
I have had a rather entertaining P&O Ports week – I emailed my old boss Mike (CEO of the North American Operations of P&O Ports, including newly devastated New Orleans) and he got back to me in only three days! I am so chuffed that he was able to get to my email so quickly.
And then, in a completely unrelated incident, I was talking to our PR firm’s Senior Consultant and it turns out that he went to school with another one of the Jolly Hockey Sticks P&O Corporate Lawyers (although Campbell Mason, the lawyer in question, is actually Australian). I had to sit down I was so amused that one cannot escape anyone, and I have only lived in two cities in my short life and already I have cross-continental contacts. I had better keep behaving well and doing sterling jobs eh?
And last, but certainly not least, this same PR Consultant, Richard by name, paid me two compliments yesterday that are making me feel far more confident that I am on the right track. About ten minutes into his talk to Jim and I, he turned to Jim and asked why he was there as I seemed to have everything under control. THEN, later in his meeting with me, I was showing him my twelve-month forward planning, he told me he had never seen a Marketing Co-Coordinator with such a long view. I was surprised and told him I would have assumed you only got anywhere with some forward planning, but he assured me that looking ahead and integrating opportunities to maximise promotional potential was, in his experience, unique to me.
*phew* I keep on feeling confident that my ideas are good, but with no external mentorship, I have not yet had my suspicions confirmed. I sleep a little better now!
I have had a rather entertaining P&O Ports week – I emailed my old boss Mike (CEO of the North American Operations of P&O Ports, including newly devastated New Orleans) and he got back to me in only three days! I am so chuffed that he was able to get to my email so quickly.
And then, in a completely unrelated incident, I was talking to our PR firm’s Senior Consultant and it turns out that he went to school with another one of the Jolly Hockey Sticks P&O Corporate Lawyers (although Campbell Mason, the lawyer in question, is actually Australian). I had to sit down I was so amused that one cannot escape anyone, and I have only lived in two cities in my short life and already I have cross-continental contacts. I had better keep behaving well and doing sterling jobs eh?
And last, but certainly not least, this same PR Consultant, Richard by name, paid me two compliments yesterday that are making me feel far more confident that I am on the right track. About ten minutes into his talk to Jim and I, he turned to Jim and asked why he was there as I seemed to have everything under control. THEN, later in his meeting with me, I was showing him my twelve-month forward planning, he told me he had never seen a Marketing Co-Coordinator with such a long view. I was surprised and told him I would have assumed you only got anywhere with some forward planning, but he assured me that looking ahead and integrating opportunities to maximise promotional potential was, in his experience, unique to me.
*phew* I keep on feeling confident that my ideas are good, but with no external mentorship, I have not yet had my suspicions confirmed. I sleep a little better now!
Saturday, November 16, 2019
16 November 2004
Anyway, on to nicer things! All my bosses are away (hence the continuous emailing!) I am going to the movies. *max scrounges around for more happy stuff* I am alive, I am warm, I have chocolate.
I will get sleep tonight.
that's about it folks.
oooh! I have no more pressure on me to write that story! :-P
Here is a little one for the afternoon ...
Once upon a time, there was a Christmas light. This Christmas light had been lighting up Regent Street for four years, the first year as blue light, the second and third as a white light and the fourth year as a red light. As a red light, it sat in the far bottom-right corner of the first rank of lights off Oxford Circus. Each day this light did its thing and while adding to the sum total of the constellations of Regent Street, it also cheered one dour Australian girl who had never been so miserable in her entire life, seeing as she was used to being stupidly happy ALL the time and not just three times a week.
This red Christmas light is a friggin legend.
THE END
I am super super bored so I am going to tell you a juicy bit of Max gossip! :) *bet you CAN'T wait!*
anyway - my little English friend Sam (inappropriate outfit at my party and dislike of anyone getting more male attention than her etc) sent me a break-up email about the time I confronted her with the three times she stepped in to effectively 'steal' the guys that were talking to me. It was a surprisingly amusing email for a few reasons -
#1 She was afraid it would be difficult for me to read and that I would hate her for writing it. *grin* sorry dear, you lost me long before this! She thought that since I brought it up that it offended me, even though I patiently explained at the time that I just wanted her to see her actions from someone else's eyes.
#2 She 'didn't really want to tell me' but each guy, after coming up to chat me up, confided in her that they were now more attracted to her. Oh NO! And to think that I would rather chew off my own arm than even talk to some stupid, ugly drunk Englishman who thought she was attractive! *retch*
#3 She outlined my faults which were - too loud, too talkative, too judgemental and too rigid. *phew* I am so glad to see that she is documenting such numerous and debilitating defects, seeing as anything she finds pitiable, I am naturally proud of!
#4 I sent her a rather cold reply and I am rid of the last friend in London that does not share my moral code, with surprisingly little inconvenience to myself. In fact, she probably thinks she broke it off herself ...
And so that is the end of that little saga. It is really sad because when there are no men around and Sam is not the wriggling, giggling and pandering to the men in the area, she is really lovely. It is just that her moral code is practically the polar opposite of mine and I am determined not to surround myself with people with dangerous or offensive moral codes!
Pip and Sam were my experiments in trying to be friends with people that did things I object to morally and how they failed!
It is one of the reasons I absolutely treasure you and Sister and Wifey - I am not alone in being an outspoken, intelligent woman that refuses to be stupid and submissive. It is a lonely road isn't it, my dear? And not many men are strong enough to walk it!
I will get sleep tonight.
that's about it folks.
oooh! I have no more pressure on me to write that story! :-P
Here is a little one for the afternoon ...
Once upon a time, there was a Christmas light. This Christmas light had been lighting up Regent Street for four years, the first year as blue light, the second and third as a white light and the fourth year as a red light. As a red light, it sat in the far bottom-right corner of the first rank of lights off Oxford Circus. Each day this light did its thing and while adding to the sum total of the constellations of Regent Street, it also cheered one dour Australian girl who had never been so miserable in her entire life, seeing as she was used to being stupidly happy ALL the time and not just three times a week.
This red Christmas light is a friggin legend.
THE END
I am super super bored so I am going to tell you a juicy bit of Max gossip! :) *bet you CAN'T wait!*
anyway - my little English friend Sam (inappropriate outfit at my party and dislike of anyone getting more male attention than her etc) sent me a break-up email about the time I confronted her with the three times she stepped in to effectively 'steal' the guys that were talking to me. It was a surprisingly amusing email for a few reasons -
#1 She was afraid it would be difficult for me to read and that I would hate her for writing it. *grin* sorry dear, you lost me long before this! She thought that since I brought it up that it offended me, even though I patiently explained at the time that I just wanted her to see her actions from someone else's eyes.
#2 She 'didn't really want to tell me' but each guy, after coming up to chat me up, confided in her that they were now more attracted to her. Oh NO! And to think that I would rather chew off my own arm than even talk to some stupid, ugly drunk Englishman who thought she was attractive! *retch*
#3 She outlined my faults which were - too loud, too talkative, too judgemental and too rigid. *phew* I am so glad to see that she is documenting such numerous and debilitating defects, seeing as anything she finds pitiable, I am naturally proud of!
#4 I sent her a rather cold reply and I am rid of the last friend in London that does not share my moral code, with surprisingly little inconvenience to myself. In fact, she probably thinks she broke it off herself ...
And so that is the end of that little saga. It is really sad because when there are no men around and Sam is not the wriggling, giggling and pandering to the men in the area, she is really lovely. It is just that her moral code is practically the polar opposite of mine and I am determined not to surround myself with people with dangerous or offensive moral codes!
Pip and Sam were my experiments in trying to be friends with people that did things I object to morally and how they failed!
It is one of the reasons I absolutely treasure you and Sister and Wifey - I am not alone in being an outspoken, intelligent woman that refuses to be stupid and submissive. It is a lonely road isn't it, my dear? And not many men are strong enough to walk it!
Friday, November 15, 2019
15 November 2005
Hey Jim - I hear you have an email in the making for me ... send it through! Send it through! This is my email to you ...
The Epershand Epistle
My overheated yet undercooked thoughts for this week.
Vellum & Purple:
I am reading Terry Pratchett's 'Night Watch' and the book has me mesmerised with each page, above and beyond Pratchett's usual ability to ensorcel his reader, because the theme of this book caresses every bruise on my heart. Night Watch has our hero, Sam Vimes, now the Commander of Ankh-Morpork's Night Watch, thrown back in time to take up the role of mentor and inspiration to his younger and greener self during his first days enlisted in the Night Watch.
Pratchett is a visceral writer, his jokes are so good your appreciation rises from inside you to meet the humour streaming into your brain and the humanity of his characters is enveloping. Vimes especially is driven by a bone-deep understanding of humans and their frailties, so when you read a novel about Vimes, you find the endless permutations of your life reflected on the page.
'Night Watch' is Vimes given the chance to BE the person that shaped his younger self, to BE the person that sees all the characters of his future life moving inevitably towards the people he knows they will be. It is a bittersweet read for me because it is like I have gone back in time also, coming back to my place of two years ago and finding myself trying to unpick the impression I left behind and resew myself, as I am now, into the fabric. At first, I did this with aggressive slices and steel staples, but now I am trying to do it with little nicks and invisible silken stitches.
It is a difficult read for me also because I have stepped back into family life and been lucky, or unlucky, enough to be the new broom that has been able to sweep some nasty things out of the family closet. Each time Vimes tries to toughen up his younger self, teach him to be tougher so he can survive to become the man he is supposed to be, I think of my forceful manhandling of my parents and my siblings so they have to look at the mess they created in the last two years, trying to drag them through the eye-opening thought processes that travelling forced me into.
Once again, Pratchett has written a book that will, I suspect, mean almost too much to me.
Glockenspiel & Gallery:
I have been listening to a mix CD that Kate gave me when I left London, and particularly enjoying a song about coffee and cigarettes. The coffee shops of Perth are the only social perk that I missed in London, but now that I live in the middle of one of the nicest coffee strips in Perth, I find that coffees (well, hot chocolate for me) should be accompanied by fine conversation, and fine conversation is something I have a serious shortage of at the moment!
The learned conservation of my London friends can easily be aligned with the image of cigarettes. Cigarettes (and far-ranging topics of conversation) are discouraged or banned from most Australian clubs and pubs, are regarded as anti-social and detrimental to your (social) health, are habits that most travellers from Europe come back with and are cultivated by only the most dedicated of 'cool' people back home.
Thus I sit in a coffee shop, nursing my sinful iced-chocolate-double-ice-cream-no-ice and I wish I could share this little slice of conversation-inducing heaven with a hard-smoking Cockney Sparrow, my favourite Evangelical, or any of the other invigorating (and not necessarily chain-smoking) friends that live in the Town with No Coffee Shops.
Take & Cut:
If you haven't yet seen Elizabethtown and were intending to see it, don't. If you want to see how good the movie could have been, watch the trailer! It was trying to be Garden State, but it was scratched from the race barely 20 minutes in. It isn't even tragically bad, it is just a pretty, floppy-haired nothing, and that was just Orlando and Kirsten. There were no engaging characters AT ALL and even Susan Sarandon couldn't save the movie, though she nearly tried. No, I can't quite believe I have spent any time writing about it; I really should have stopped at the first sentence.
The only good thing about seeing the movie? The quote 'I'm going to miss your lips, and everything attached to them.' Cute, but not cute enough I'm afraid.
The movie I did enjoy was 'The Wild Parrots of Telegraph Hill', which was so good the theatre was sniffling and clearing their throats at the plights of parrots!
Philglass & Swigott:
I spent the last week on an incredibly indulgent run of End to End Eating Engagements, of which the majority of the dining was conducted at the superb restaurant on Cottesloe Beach, The Blue Duck. The Blue Duck is situated a mere 20m from the breaking waves and sits next to the Cottesloe Surf Club, so my three hour Saturday breakfast and my four hour Sunday lunch was spent inhaling fabulous food at not inconsiderable prices while dreamily letting my sunglasses track the bronzed bodies of the male surf lifesavers bustle around the beach in front of us.
Saturday breakfast was especially enjoyable as it was graced by genuine top totty in 'The Body', a young man who stopped the conversation of the entire balcony as he went past, and so entranced our table at the end closest to the surf club, that the lifesaver on duty started laughing at our stunned ogling. Quite embarrassing that!
Eighty & Daze:
I have an MSN friend, Jakob, a frighteningly intelligent 19-year-old Croatian who constantly humbles me with his wide-ranging world political knowledge. Our first conversation was such a success because he was able to tell me more about the treatment of Australian Aborigines than I had learnt at an Australian University.
The other day he recommended me the New Perspectives Quarterly to read, and I am here to recommend it to you … read, learn, and marvel!
http://digitalnpq.org/
And if you don't trust Jakob and I, trust the peer reviews …
http://www.blackwellpublishing.com/journal.asp?ref=0893-7850&site=1
Old & New & Borrowed & Blue:
I have always been a very lucky little girl, which meant I was always relentlessly optimistic, I had a grand total of 30 seconds depression a year and I cried maybe twice a year if I was lucky, usually at the end of a favourite book. The world just never gave me reason to cry …
The other day I discovered an endless supply of ready-to-shed bitter tears, and they appeared because I started researching what charity work my company could be involved with. I started looking at the websites of all the charities I could find and as tales of abuse followed tales of sickness followed tales of disaster, the screen started blurring as I lost control of my usually sunny emotions and I just started crying at my desk. And the tears lasted for hours and even days now as I try to continue to do the research I needed to do.
I puzzled over this strange loss of control on the part of my more light-hearted side and finally came to the conclusion that my experience of poverty, sickness and helplessness has changed drastically since I left Perth. Firstly it is the irrefutable fact that I have seen hardship and suffering close up now, from the local beggars in London to the slums of Istanbul. I have seen it with my own eyes and now when I read about problems, it is personal for me.
Even more importantly I have seen just how bloody big the world is and how difficult it is to change and stuck a million miles from anywhere in Perth I fully understand how little I can do to help things along. When you are in the centre of it you can make a decision to do small things that help immediately. When you are far away you can only do things that rarely ever show you a tangible result.
I wait ... :)
The Epershand Epistle
My overheated yet undercooked thoughts for this week.
Vellum & Purple:
I am reading Terry Pratchett's 'Night Watch' and the book has me mesmerised with each page, above and beyond Pratchett's usual ability to ensorcel his reader, because the theme of this book caresses every bruise on my heart. Night Watch has our hero, Sam Vimes, now the Commander of Ankh-Morpork's Night Watch, thrown back in time to take up the role of mentor and inspiration to his younger and greener self during his first days enlisted in the Night Watch.
Pratchett is a visceral writer, his jokes are so good your appreciation rises from inside you to meet the humour streaming into your brain and the humanity of his characters is enveloping. Vimes especially is driven by a bone-deep understanding of humans and their frailties, so when you read a novel about Vimes, you find the endless permutations of your life reflected on the page.
'Night Watch' is Vimes given the chance to BE the person that shaped his younger self, to BE the person that sees all the characters of his future life moving inevitably towards the people he knows they will be. It is a bittersweet read for me because it is like I have gone back in time also, coming back to my place of two years ago and finding myself trying to unpick the impression I left behind and resew myself, as I am now, into the fabric. At first, I did this with aggressive slices and steel staples, but now I am trying to do it with little nicks and invisible silken stitches.
It is a difficult read for me also because I have stepped back into family life and been lucky, or unlucky, enough to be the new broom that has been able to sweep some nasty things out of the family closet. Each time Vimes tries to toughen up his younger self, teach him to be tougher so he can survive to become the man he is supposed to be, I think of my forceful manhandling of my parents and my siblings so they have to look at the mess they created in the last two years, trying to drag them through the eye-opening thought processes that travelling forced me into.
Once again, Pratchett has written a book that will, I suspect, mean almost too much to me.
Glockenspiel & Gallery:
I have been listening to a mix CD that Kate gave me when I left London, and particularly enjoying a song about coffee and cigarettes. The coffee shops of Perth are the only social perk that I missed in London, but now that I live in the middle of one of the nicest coffee strips in Perth, I find that coffees (well, hot chocolate for me) should be accompanied by fine conversation, and fine conversation is something I have a serious shortage of at the moment!
The learned conservation of my London friends can easily be aligned with the image of cigarettes. Cigarettes (and far-ranging topics of conversation) are discouraged or banned from most Australian clubs and pubs, are regarded as anti-social and detrimental to your (social) health, are habits that most travellers from Europe come back with and are cultivated by only the most dedicated of 'cool' people back home.
Thus I sit in a coffee shop, nursing my sinful iced-chocolate-double-ice-cream-no-ice and I wish I could share this little slice of conversation-inducing heaven with a hard-smoking Cockney Sparrow, my favourite Evangelical, or any of the other invigorating (and not necessarily chain-smoking) friends that live in the Town with No Coffee Shops.
Take & Cut:
If you haven't yet seen Elizabethtown and were intending to see it, don't. If you want to see how good the movie could have been, watch the trailer! It was trying to be Garden State, but it was scratched from the race barely 20 minutes in. It isn't even tragically bad, it is just a pretty, floppy-haired nothing, and that was just Orlando and Kirsten. There were no engaging characters AT ALL and even Susan Sarandon couldn't save the movie, though she nearly tried. No, I can't quite believe I have spent any time writing about it; I really should have stopped at the first sentence.
The only good thing about seeing the movie? The quote 'I'm going to miss your lips, and everything attached to them.' Cute, but not cute enough I'm afraid.
The movie I did enjoy was 'The Wild Parrots of Telegraph Hill', which was so good the theatre was sniffling and clearing their throats at the plights of parrots!
Philglass & Swigott:
I spent the last week on an incredibly indulgent run of End to End Eating Engagements, of which the majority of the dining was conducted at the superb restaurant on Cottesloe Beach, The Blue Duck. The Blue Duck is situated a mere 20m from the breaking waves and sits next to the Cottesloe Surf Club, so my three hour Saturday breakfast and my four hour Sunday lunch was spent inhaling fabulous food at not inconsiderable prices while dreamily letting my sunglasses track the bronzed bodies of the male surf lifesavers bustle around the beach in front of us.
Saturday breakfast was especially enjoyable as it was graced by genuine top totty in 'The Body', a young man who stopped the conversation of the entire balcony as he went past, and so entranced our table at the end closest to the surf club, that the lifesaver on duty started laughing at our stunned ogling. Quite embarrassing that!
Eighty & Daze:
I have an MSN friend, Jakob, a frighteningly intelligent 19-year-old Croatian who constantly humbles me with his wide-ranging world political knowledge. Our first conversation was such a success because he was able to tell me more about the treatment of Australian Aborigines than I had learnt at an Australian University.
The other day he recommended me the New Perspectives Quarterly to read, and I am here to recommend it to you … read, learn, and marvel!
http://digitalnpq.org/
And if you don't trust Jakob and I, trust the peer reviews …
http://www.blackwellpublishing.com/journal.asp?ref=0893-7850&site=1
Old & New & Borrowed & Blue:
I have always been a very lucky little girl, which meant I was always relentlessly optimistic, I had a grand total of 30 seconds depression a year and I cried maybe twice a year if I was lucky, usually at the end of a favourite book. The world just never gave me reason to cry …
The other day I discovered an endless supply of ready-to-shed bitter tears, and they appeared because I started researching what charity work my company could be involved with. I started looking at the websites of all the charities I could find and as tales of abuse followed tales of sickness followed tales of disaster, the screen started blurring as I lost control of my usually sunny emotions and I just started crying at my desk. And the tears lasted for hours and even days now as I try to continue to do the research I needed to do.
I puzzled over this strange loss of control on the part of my more light-hearted side and finally came to the conclusion that my experience of poverty, sickness and helplessness has changed drastically since I left Perth. Firstly it is the irrefutable fact that I have seen hardship and suffering close up now, from the local beggars in London to the slums of Istanbul. I have seen it with my own eyes and now when I read about problems, it is personal for me.
Even more importantly I have seen just how bloody big the world is and how difficult it is to change and stuck a million miles from anywhere in Perth I fully understand how little I can do to help things along. When you are in the centre of it you can make a decision to do small things that help immediately. When you are far away you can only do things that rarely ever show you a tangible result.
I wait ... :)
15 November 2004
dying of the cold
Morning sweetie
You know the way I sounded this morning? Well, if you looked at my soul at the moment it would look like I sounded. I am in a great black hole of boredom and tiredness, disillusionment and loneliness. It is like I have forgotten what it is like to be happy all the time. Sometimes I listen to the complaints, bitching, derogatory and cynical comments spilling out of my mouth and I swear that I am not the person I used to be and I want to scream and cry.
I just want to go home. I want to sit in sunlight on the beach, watch unbearably happy people and know that there is nothing standing between my heart and that of those that love me but warm, brown skin.
I cannot imagine how I am going to fare this winter. I am being really bolshie about doing things I love now, I refuse to mix with people that annoy me (the Fi and Kim sagas have reached their conclusions) and I am consciously trying to get that mischievous sense of enjoying everything back. But this place sucks it ALL out of me.
Why do I have to leave my heart all black and blue to keep my mind happy? I am not sure I am the sacrificial kind I think, I cannot neglect one part of my soul for the other. I am tired, I need some sunlight and I need a goddamn hug.
*grr*
Morning sweetie
You know the way I sounded this morning? Well, if you looked at my soul at the moment it would look like I sounded. I am in a great black hole of boredom and tiredness, disillusionment and loneliness. It is like I have forgotten what it is like to be happy all the time. Sometimes I listen to the complaints, bitching, derogatory and cynical comments spilling out of my mouth and I swear that I am not the person I used to be and I want to scream and cry.
I just want to go home. I want to sit in sunlight on the beach, watch unbearably happy people and know that there is nothing standing between my heart and that of those that love me but warm, brown skin.
I cannot imagine how I am going to fare this winter. I am being really bolshie about doing things I love now, I refuse to mix with people that annoy me (the Fi and Kim sagas have reached their conclusions) and I am consciously trying to get that mischievous sense of enjoying everything back. But this place sucks it ALL out of me.
Why do I have to leave my heart all black and blue to keep my mind happy? I am not sure I am the sacrificial kind I think, I cannot neglect one part of my soul for the other. I am tired, I need some sunlight and I need a goddamn hug.
*grr*
Thursday, November 14, 2019
14 November 2012
Max has heard from the Italians regarding cooking offal; what about the Persians and the Greeks?
Wifey: The answer is yes! We cook all sort of intestines and internal organs and -a bit more disturbingly for me- testicles!
Wifey: http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magiritsa
Wifey: http://kalofagas.ca/2010/04/07/kokoretsi-κοκορέτσι/
Greek in London: Oh gosh no idea! I'm vegetarian :)
Greek in Perth: I don't do offal. I'm still of the belief that offal is awful! If anyone thinks they can change my mind, however, I am willing for that challenge. I know the Greeks like pan fried chicken liver...I think it's awful. This is as far as my knowledge on offal goes lol
Max: So glad you used the Awful Offal line. I have been waiting, waiting ...
Max and Archie would like to cook brain, tongue, heart, liver, kidneys, tripe, tail, trotters, cheek, sweetbreads and blood - who has recipes they are willing to share?
Southern Italian: Find the recipe for Nduja! Ohhhh and make Trippa Alla fiorentina....
Southern Italian: And black pudding! And trotters boiled until soft and then finished in a sticky dark sauce. And poach the tongue then slice it and grill it! SO MANY CHOICES
Moses: A pie!
Max: Southern Italian you are brilliant. I will be going to your Dad! He'd be able to get me a sheep's head right?
Southern Italian: Easily. And ask him for recipes! Or ask Uncle in the front of the shop!
Northern Italian: As a vegetarian I am horrified but as an Italian I am impressed!
I have a number of good recipes from my Nonna's cookbook … let me know if you want 'Budino di Cervella' (Brain Souffle), 'Budellini di Agnello alla Lombardia" (Lamb's intestines Lombardian style), 'Coratella di Capretto' (Baby Goat Offal, Hunter style), 'Spezzatino di Interiora' (Tripe and Sweetbread Stew) … my god there are so many tripe recipes
Northern Italian: Omg I just found a recipe using donkey meat and snails …
Northern Italian: Seriously there is not one but two different Donkey Stew recipes, WHY?!?
Max: Send them through my dear! Also, we are being environmentally friendly and using ALL of the animal that has been killed
Northern Italian: Okay I will message you *after* I finish eating my ricotta and salad dinner. Feeling a little queasy right now lol
Max: You are an amazing brave vegetarian! :-)
Northern Italian: Out of all those recipes the only one I've consumed would be 'sanguinaccio' - it was actually really nice, that was years ago though!
Max: They are amazing recipes, and thank you SO MUCH for translating them for us. The chocolate blood pudding looks incredible!
Southern Italian: omg max can you email them to me too???
Northern Italian: I'll translate more this week, seriously I haven't even begun to scratch the surface of the ol' family tripe recipe collection :P
Wifey: The answer is yes! We cook all sort of intestines and internal organs and -a bit more disturbingly for me- testicles!
Wifey: http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magiritsa
Wifey: http://kalofagas.ca/2010/04/07/kokoretsi-κοκορέτσι/
Greek in London: Oh gosh no idea! I'm vegetarian :)
Greek in Perth: I don't do offal. I'm still of the belief that offal is awful! If anyone thinks they can change my mind, however, I am willing for that challenge. I know the Greeks like pan fried chicken liver...I think it's awful. This is as far as my knowledge on offal goes lol
Max: So glad you used the Awful Offal line. I have been waiting, waiting ...
Max and Archie would like to cook brain, tongue, heart, liver, kidneys, tripe, tail, trotters, cheek, sweetbreads and blood - who has recipes they are willing to share?
Southern Italian: Find the recipe for Nduja! Ohhhh and make Trippa Alla fiorentina....
Southern Italian: And black pudding! And trotters boiled until soft and then finished in a sticky dark sauce. And poach the tongue then slice it and grill it! SO MANY CHOICES
Moses: A pie!
Max: Southern Italian you are brilliant. I will be going to your Dad! He'd be able to get me a sheep's head right?
Southern Italian: Easily. And ask him for recipes! Or ask Uncle in the front of the shop!
Northern Italian: As a vegetarian I am horrified but as an Italian I am impressed!
I have a number of good recipes from my Nonna's cookbook … let me know if you want 'Budino di Cervella' (Brain Souffle), 'Budellini di Agnello alla Lombardia" (Lamb's intestines Lombardian style), 'Coratella di Capretto' (Baby Goat Offal, Hunter style), 'Spezzatino di Interiora' (Tripe and Sweetbread Stew) … my god there are so many tripe recipes
Northern Italian: Omg I just found a recipe using donkey meat and snails …
Northern Italian: Seriously there is not one but two different Donkey Stew recipes, WHY?!?
Max: Send them through my dear! Also, we are being environmentally friendly and using ALL of the animal that has been killed
Northern Italian: Okay I will message you *after* I finish eating my ricotta and salad dinner. Feeling a little queasy right now lol
Max: You are an amazing brave vegetarian! :-)
Northern Italian: Out of all those recipes the only one I've consumed would be 'sanguinaccio' - it was actually really nice, that was years ago though!
Max: They are amazing recipes, and thank you SO MUCH for translating them for us. The chocolate blood pudding looks incredible!
Southern Italian: omg max can you email them to me too???
Northern Italian: I'll translate more this week, seriously I haven't even begun to scratch the surface of the ol' family tripe recipe collection :P
14 November 2006
TO ASH, CHE, ELBOW, GERRY, JOEY, ROBBIE, TOM
*Right* ... so, Friday is all sorted then!
I may have mentioned *cough* that I was going to the West End for drinks with family and friends this Friday night to the young man. Actually, I only wrote 'Friday, essays handed in, West End, Brother, Friends, Drinking.'
What was his reply? Which pubs he would be in on Friday, approximately what times, the NAMES of who he was going with AND he asked if he was going to have to stay out of my way because of how much of an idiot he was to Romeo.
So girls, Friday night, I think you will all most likely get to meet the young man.
Your holy mission, however, is this:
The group picks the pub - I *NEVER* get to say 'We should go' because the young man is not there.
You girls pinch me if I survey the door too much!
And when he arrives, as is inevitable he will at some point during the night, I MUST NOT STIR ONE FOOT TO MEET THE ENEMY! If you see me even *twitch* in the direction of a tall, attractive brunet that looks like all those photos you have seen, PLEASE lean over and latch onto my arm for grim death.
If indeed he does arrive and decides to come over, the grilling is ALL yours, girls! :)
And that is about the size and the shape of it.
Off to try and pretend I care about a whole lot of things at work, when I really, REALLY don't.
*Right* ... so, Friday is all sorted then!
I may have mentioned *cough* that I was going to the West End for drinks with family and friends this Friday night to the young man. Actually, I only wrote 'Friday, essays handed in, West End, Brother, Friends, Drinking.'
What was his reply? Which pubs he would be in on Friday, approximately what times, the NAMES of who he was going with AND he asked if he was going to have to stay out of my way because of how much of an idiot he was to Romeo.
So girls, Friday night, I think you will all most likely get to meet the young man.
Your holy mission, however, is this:
The group picks the pub - I *NEVER* get to say 'We should go' because the young man is not there.
You girls pinch me if I survey the door too much!
And when he arrives, as is inevitable he will at some point during the night, I MUST NOT STIR ONE FOOT TO MEET THE ENEMY! If you see me even *twitch* in the direction of a tall, attractive brunet that looks like all those photos you have seen, PLEASE lean over and latch onto my arm for grim death.
If indeed he does arrive and decides to come over, the grilling is ALL yours, girls! :)
And that is about the size and the shape of it.
Off to try and pretend I care about a whole lot of things at work, when I really, REALLY don't.
Monday, November 11, 2019
11 November 2006
Notice of Intention
Wifey, Sister - thank you for lending me your ears this afternoon.
It is incredibly important to me that you both heard what I decided today because you two have seen me reach my dreams (a visa) and seen it taken away from me the next day. In London you met the Max that was living the life she wanted, you saw me free and powerful and able to reach my almost impossible goals through sheer will and work.
I was re-reading my diary the other day and I found an entry where I recorded that you, Sister, told me in no uncertain terms that you just knew I was going to get a visa. And you were right, so right.
And Wifey, I cannot adequately describe the pleasure your marriage to your husband brings to me, that night you two first met was such an extraordinary meeting of otherwise separate people that resulted in something beautiful. That I was able to start off such a string of events is an incredible treasure in my heart.
In an extraordinary convergence of fate I have in my sight exactly what I want in life, and I am going to take it, no faltering, no mistakes.
And I will be inspired by my wifey and my sister as I reach out because I know that the person you know is capable of anything she puts her mind to.
On a lighter note, my GOD the boy is incredibly hot! :) On Monday he came in to see me and as he left he thought of something else he needed to say and came running back up the corridor towards me. Seeing that incredible body moving towards me at that loping footballer's run was truly an awesome sight! *grin* Sometimes I wonder how I could have POSSIBLY been good enough to be rewarded with him. I think some forms got mixed up in the Man Allocation Office ...
Not that I am complaining!
much distracted love
Wifey, Sister - thank you for lending me your ears this afternoon.
It is incredibly important to me that you both heard what I decided today because you two have seen me reach my dreams (a visa) and seen it taken away from me the next day. In London you met the Max that was living the life she wanted, you saw me free and powerful and able to reach my almost impossible goals through sheer will and work.
I was re-reading my diary the other day and I found an entry where I recorded that you, Sister, told me in no uncertain terms that you just knew I was going to get a visa. And you were right, so right.
And Wifey, I cannot adequately describe the pleasure your marriage to your husband brings to me, that night you two first met was such an extraordinary meeting of otherwise separate people that resulted in something beautiful. That I was able to start off such a string of events is an incredible treasure in my heart.
In an extraordinary convergence of fate I have in my sight exactly what I want in life, and I am going to take it, no faltering, no mistakes.
And I will be inspired by my wifey and my sister as I reach out because I know that the person you know is capable of anything she puts her mind to.
On a lighter note, my GOD the boy is incredibly hot! :) On Monday he came in to see me and as he left he thought of something else he needed to say and came running back up the corridor towards me. Seeing that incredible body moving towards me at that loping footballer's run was truly an awesome sight! *grin* Sometimes I wonder how I could have POSSIBLY been good enough to be rewarded with him. I think some forms got mixed up in the Man Allocation Office ...
Not that I am complaining!
much distracted love
11 November 2005
M
Hey there. Here we go.
Your quick-she's-back-let's-get-her-hitched story gave me a chuckle.
a) because I'm distanced from it and
b) cos I know you'll be able to handle it, even if you're finding it difficult at times.
Those new guys sound pretty nice. I'm waiting for more info, when you're ready to tell me.
I've been going close to my limits most days recently. Work-wise, business-wise and personally. I've been doing daily goal setting and as such I'm seeing continual improvement just happen, almost by magic.
On the weekend I went to a painting and tarot workshop. I found it interesting. (who'd have thought *I'd* say that hey?) Basically we pulled a tarot card and that was our theme. We then started fingerpainting on huge 2x2 meter pages and then used those paintings to see what comes up.
[excised for privacy purposes]
Jesus! 11 massive paragraphs about women. Not how I intended this email, but the raw truth of what's going on in me *right now*.
I'm also seeing my businesses grow. More on that later - I have a singing lesson to go to, and a teacher to convert into a friend.
MAX
That was a bit epic, but I think you know what you are doing.
To me, she sounds Great, and Great is wonderful as long as you don't hurt Great when Perfect comes along. Great is the kind of person you want to make sure you look after, be very truthful with and Great is the partner you want to treat with the utmost respect when you leave her, because Great can also be the kind of ex-Great that you can be proud of.
As soon as you are treating her as less than Great you leave her because she is also the kind of person you don't want to mistreat, it is bad karma. If you start treating Great people badly, it can lead to nasty habits etc.
So I reckon bear those three things in mind, treat her well while you have her, treat her VERY well when you leave and leave as soon as you know you are not treating her as you should. Hopefully, when you find Perfect you will never need to keep those three things in mind!
And why am I saying THIS instead of the myriad of things I could say? Because I met my first ever boyfriend (before my best boyfriend, you would have met him at my Halloween Party) for lunch on Tuesday and was forcefully reminded that I have only gone out with men that I can be very proud of, that he and I are utterly perfect for each other bar the sexual chemistry, and that two of my three were Great in intellect and personality but only one of my three was Great in love. Thank god I treated them all as outlined above eh? While mistakes were made, at least I came out of it with three ex-Greats.
I wonder if the next Great will be along soon, or if it will be my Perfect.
And as for your questions about HOW, well, let's just agree that we will never know, all we can do is hope and treat everyone in the manner that you would like to effortlessly treat your Perfect, because then you will not miss your Perfect when she comes along.
M
Very true.
Your point about treating them as you should, or as with Perfect you will automatically do, rang loudly for me … and then you've also added to it. About doing things effortlessly, I'd been thinking that, but saw that seeing as that wasn't the case, it was an indication that she wasn't Perfect, therefore bad. You've given me words that changed this from a bad thing to a good thing. Nice work Bell.
Oh and I spoke with my singing teacher, and told her I'd be better with her as a friend, and she's ok with that. In fact it made things easier between us - probably tantamount to how we were both unconsciously putting pressure on ourselves with a relationship.
Sex, lust, romance, love. Such big things that affect us deeply to our core of who we are - and come from our core ...
Hey there. Here we go.
Your quick-she's-back-let's-get-her-hitched story gave me a chuckle.
a) because I'm distanced from it and
b) cos I know you'll be able to handle it, even if you're finding it difficult at times.
Those new guys sound pretty nice. I'm waiting for more info, when you're ready to tell me.
I've been going close to my limits most days recently. Work-wise, business-wise and personally. I've been doing daily goal setting and as such I'm seeing continual improvement just happen, almost by magic.
On the weekend I went to a painting and tarot workshop. I found it interesting. (who'd have thought *I'd* say that hey?) Basically we pulled a tarot card and that was our theme. We then started fingerpainting on huge 2x2 meter pages and then used those paintings to see what comes up.
[excised for privacy purposes]
Jesus! 11 massive paragraphs about women. Not how I intended this email, but the raw truth of what's going on in me *right now*.
I'm also seeing my businesses grow. More on that later - I have a singing lesson to go to, and a teacher to convert into a friend.
MAX
That was a bit epic, but I think you know what you are doing.
To me, she sounds Great, and Great is wonderful as long as you don't hurt Great when Perfect comes along. Great is the kind of person you want to make sure you look after, be very truthful with and Great is the partner you want to treat with the utmost respect when you leave her, because Great can also be the kind of ex-Great that you can be proud of.
As soon as you are treating her as less than Great you leave her because she is also the kind of person you don't want to mistreat, it is bad karma. If you start treating Great people badly, it can lead to nasty habits etc.
So I reckon bear those three things in mind, treat her well while you have her, treat her VERY well when you leave and leave as soon as you know you are not treating her as you should. Hopefully, when you find Perfect you will never need to keep those three things in mind!
And why am I saying THIS instead of the myriad of things I could say? Because I met my first ever boyfriend (before my best boyfriend, you would have met him at my Halloween Party) for lunch on Tuesday and was forcefully reminded that I have only gone out with men that I can be very proud of, that he and I are utterly perfect for each other bar the sexual chemistry, and that two of my three were Great in intellect and personality but only one of my three was Great in love. Thank god I treated them all as outlined above eh? While mistakes were made, at least I came out of it with three ex-Greats.
I wonder if the next Great will be along soon, or if it will be my Perfect.
And as for your questions about HOW, well, let's just agree that we will never know, all we can do is hope and treat everyone in the manner that you would like to effortlessly treat your Perfect, because then you will not miss your Perfect when she comes along.
M
Very true.
Your point about treating them as you should, or as with Perfect you will automatically do, rang loudly for me … and then you've also added to it. About doing things effortlessly, I'd been thinking that, but saw that seeing as that wasn't the case, it was an indication that she wasn't Perfect, therefore bad. You've given me words that changed this from a bad thing to a good thing. Nice work Bell.
Oh and I spoke with my singing teacher, and told her I'd be better with her as a friend, and she's ok with that. In fact it made things easier between us - probably tantamount to how we were both unconsciously putting pressure on ourselves with a relationship.
Sex, lust, romance, love. Such big things that affect us deeply to our core of who we are - and come from our core ...
Sunday, November 10, 2019
10 November 2010
Max thinks Dean will be happy to know that she has been having a really good week with the Chocolate Military ...
Dean: i hope this isn't what i think it is … or that is IS … details! (and PHOTOS) :) :) :) <3 <3 <3 xxox
Max: hahahaha, no, not as good as one would hope, but pleasant nevertheless! I just had to mention it seeing as the expression charmed me by itself, and when I was chatting to the lovely 'Soldiers' in question, it was just so perfect
Dean: ahahaahhaahahahahah
sweet kimchee pickles, i hope u didn't call them that. to their (sweet, chocolatey) faces
Max: No, worse! I was letting my mouth go on automatic as my brain was chanting 'don't call them chocolate military, don't call them anything silly, keep your eyes up.' It is a blessing and a curse that my brain and my mouth are so seldom actually connected to each other ...
Dean: AHAHAHA
"keep your eyes up"
hahaahhahahaaaahahahahahahaha
<3 <3 <3
Max: see, I am really good at eye-contact and just sharpening the old peripheral vision ... professional, you may say :)
Dean: i fcking LOVE it !!! hahaha!!
if only they taught us these life skills in school
Max: Methinks there is no learning of these skills darls, one is born with them or not at all! It is a skill I got from my Mum actually ...
Dean: all i got from my mum was a really fast walk :(
Dean: that sounds harsh. there are other things i scored too - but nothing of the "eyes above waist" skillset
Max: perhaps I will run a residential weekend, which will be spent on the beach sans sunglasses to teach these essential skills ...
Max: Also, dude, eyes above NECK! *tsk* see, that's where you are going wrong ...
Dean: AHAHAHAHAHA
my bad, my bad. what an amateur. Hahahahaha
Dean: i hope this isn't what i think it is … or that is IS … details! (and PHOTOS) :) :) :) <3 <3 <3 xxox
Max: hahahaha, no, not as good as one would hope, but pleasant nevertheless! I just had to mention it seeing as the expression charmed me by itself, and when I was chatting to the lovely 'Soldiers' in question, it was just so perfect
Dean: ahahaahhaahahahahah
sweet kimchee pickles, i hope u didn't call them that. to their (sweet, chocolatey) faces
Max: No, worse! I was letting my mouth go on automatic as my brain was chanting 'don't call them chocolate military, don't call them anything silly, keep your eyes up.' It is a blessing and a curse that my brain and my mouth are so seldom actually connected to each other ...
Dean: AHAHAHA
"keep your eyes up"
hahaahhahahaaaahahahahahahaha
<3 <3 <3
Max: see, I am really good at eye-contact and just sharpening the old peripheral vision ... professional, you may say :)
Dean: i fcking LOVE it !!! hahaha!!
if only they taught us these life skills in school
Max: Methinks there is no learning of these skills darls, one is born with them or not at all! It is a skill I got from my Mum actually ...
Dean: all i got from my mum was a really fast walk :(
Dean: that sounds harsh. there are other things i scored too - but nothing of the "eyes above waist" skillset
Max: perhaps I will run a residential weekend, which will be spent on the beach sans sunglasses to teach these essential skills ...
Max: Also, dude, eyes above NECK! *tsk* see, that's where you are going wrong ...
Dean: AHAHAHAHAHA
my bad, my bad. what an amateur. Hahahahaha
Saturday, November 09, 2019
9 November 2007
*lol* AAAANNNNDDD I'm pretty sure it would take a minor miracle on my behalf to become taller, skinner, have bigger boobs, leopard print top, super tan and REALLY straight black hair! :P
I've seen him out and about and the girls he is with *shakes head* no, I think I shall forever be grinning lasciviously at him from a distance ... although my mother does like him! :)
Goddess Max knows her audience! Goddess Max goes to out on Saturdays and has to fend off 22-year-old emos ... my Saturday night at Amps was hilarious, nearly giving myself a heart attack when I tried to get rid of the 22-year-olds by saying I was closer to 27 than 26.
ARGH! When did I get this OLD? :) On the other hand, toyboys are so in right now and I just need to get over the stigma of snogging around my sister’s age ...
No, indeed, more horrifying things to do with boys have overtaken me since him, making him merely the start of a rather horrid pattern of six useless men, the last two I was able to spot a mile away and avoid neatly because I can now see them coming.
Ah, what can I say? I hope I have quashed all apparent attractions I may have for men who wish to muck around. Yes indeed. Those 22-year-olds are getting the 'settling down' vibe off me big time methinks.
I've seen him out and about and the girls he is with *shakes head* no, I think I shall forever be grinning lasciviously at him from a distance ... although my mother does like him! :)
Goddess Max knows her audience! Goddess Max goes to out on Saturdays and has to fend off 22-year-old emos ... my Saturday night at Amps was hilarious, nearly giving myself a heart attack when I tried to get rid of the 22-year-olds by saying I was closer to 27 than 26.
ARGH! When did I get this OLD? :) On the other hand, toyboys are so in right now and I just need to get over the stigma of snogging around my sister’s age ...
No, indeed, more horrifying things to do with boys have overtaken me since him, making him merely the start of a rather horrid pattern of six useless men, the last two I was able to spot a mile away and avoid neatly because I can now see them coming.
Ah, what can I say? I hope I have quashed all apparent attractions I may have for men who wish to muck around. Yes indeed. Those 22-year-olds are getting the 'settling down' vibe off me big time methinks.
Friday, November 08, 2019
8 November 2015
From: MAX
Date: Thu, 31 Jul 2014
To: vf@hotmail.com
Subject: Attractive
There you are then said Hermione in a superior tone They see the Grim and die of fright
you've one private email from buddy
Click here to view email
<vf@hotmail.com>
Fri, Aug 1, 2014
to MAX
RE: Attractive
This address does not accept emails from malicious and discontent spinsters.
MAX
Fri, Aug 1, 2014
to VF
So glad you saw it was a virus!
Hi V
I was watching the emails leave my sent mail in horror, so glad you knew it was a virus - why they are using Hermione as a quote is beyond me :(
Did you enjoy the IAS lecture I saw you at?
Max
MAX
Fri, Aug 1, 2014, 4:14 PM
to person whose email I opened to get the virus
The one TOTALLY AWESOME thing that came out of the hacking
OMG, you have to see what happened from that spam email debacle!!
The girl below was super close friends with me for four weeks in 2010, then she disappeared from the face of the earth.
THEN I got the reply below to the spam ...
Now, she is either making a joke about the quote from Hermione, which wouldn't make a lot of sense ... or ...
SHE IS THROWING SHADE AT ME!!
And it delights me because I still don't know what happened for her to disappear, but obviously it is something I said about boyfriends (neither of us had one at the time, not that it mattered)
AND, she thinks she has insulted me, when she has actually complimented me. And backhand insulted herself by inferring that relationship status is something so important to her that it is open to insult.
MAX
"This address does not accept emails from malicious and discontent spinsters."
Nov 4, 2015
to VF
V - I just wanted to thank you for your excellent reply to this spam email!
The comment has gone on to become a rather fabulous story, and been used to elicit much amusement from my friends.
I have included some screenshots of its starring role in some jokes.
I hope you are having a wonderful day
Max
VF
Sun, Nov 8, 2015
to MAX
Wel it captured the spirit of the intended receipt well, obviously. Otherwise instead it would have to be worded that this email address doesn't accept spam from discontent women who do everything within their power to break up relationships and make accusations that have far-reaching consequences.
Obviously, your actions speak louder than words ever will and the fact you've had to reply nearly a year later proves a case in point to your unhappy life. Now, do fuck off.
MAX
Sun, Nov 8, 2015
to VF
V - have you mistaken me for someone else who actually knew you?
I can't imagine how I could have so much power in your life in less than a handful of meetings and no contact in five years. You literally didn't know me at all then and don't know me since … so why all this anger?
Have you talked to someone about this displacement of your own problems onto complete strangers from the past? It seems not conducive for your own ability to stay happy or healthy.
I hope you are able to find some peace with yourself, because I cannot imagine how your response to my clearly spam email after five years of no contact, and such a quick acquaintance of almost no depth, was warranted.
Although your response was turned to good use, and I have let you know that it continues to live on, so thank you, again, for excellent material!
hacked hacked <vf@hotmail.com>
Sun, Nov 8, 2015
to MAX
Claire, the question is why are you contacting someone whom you don't know and only met a handful of times from five years ago? Very odd and quite honestly disturbing, hence the fuck off.
MAX
Nov 8, 2015
to hacked
Ah, but I didn't contact you, my love, you contacted me over a spam email.
I do have to ask though, what did I say that has such a strong hold over you after so long?
VF
Mon, Nov 9, 2015
to MAX
Re: "This address does not accept emails from malicious and discontent spinsters who attempt to subvert their palpable rage and indignation by continually harassing people they don't know. In such circumstances may one suggest online dating, perhaps?"
MAX
Mon, Nov 9, 2015, 7:53 AM
to VF
Now I think we are getting to the crux of the matter
V
This is very, very intriguing.
All I remember of our last meeting is that we discussed a man I didn't know in passing.
You presented all the pertinent details, and going on the fact that those were the details you told me (since I didn't know the dude), I put forward an opinion based on the facts you told me.
I don't remember the dude, the details or the opinion, I just know I never saw you again.
Until your reply to my spam email, I just assumed we had parted because of natural causes - I remember seeing you at UWA and saying hello because I was happy to see you.
The thing I found most intriguing about your reply to the email is that since you knew me for such a short time, and had not witnessed my life since then, your reply told me more about you than me.
You decided that you wanted to tell me the worst about myself, but you revealed what you hated most about yourself. You don't know my life now, so how could you craft a real insult?
Instead you crafted a really awesome sentence that was about you and some need you have for confession and cleansing.
Now, your replies have been REALLY clear that this is about men, partnerships and some kind of trust issues.
So, some questions:
1. Considering I didn't know the guy talked about, or any of your male friends, how did I affect them in regards to you?
2. Have I subsequently been involved with one of your male friends or partners since? If so, I did not know that they were your partner or friend.
3. If I have been involved with your partner, I can assure you that he was cheating on you, as all my partners are explicitly told I don't sleep with other women's partners unless that partner is with us.
I understand the pain of not having a monogamous male partner when you want one, I see it in my friends all the time, and I wish you well in finding what you want.
Essentially, why I loved your reply, and used it to great comic effect, is because being called a spinster is a great compliment to me, as I have always been and will alway be a spinster.
I am also non-monogamous, heteroflexible and I have a very well ordered and fulfilling sexual life that helps keep my successful writing career on track.
If the well-ordered sex life has hurt you unwittingly on my behalf I do apologise, but I try very hard to screen for cheaters.
All the best with everything going forward.
Max, spinster of the parish (it's a feature, not a bug!)
Date: Thu, 31 Jul 2014
To: vf@hotmail.com
Subject: Attractive
There you are then said Hermione in a superior tone They see the Grim and die of fright
you've one private email from buddy
Click here to view email
<vf@hotmail.com>
Fri, Aug 1, 2014
to MAX
RE: Attractive
This address does not accept emails from malicious and discontent spinsters.
MAX
Fri, Aug 1, 2014
to VF
So glad you saw it was a virus!
Hi V
I was watching the emails leave my sent mail in horror, so glad you knew it was a virus - why they are using Hermione as a quote is beyond me :(
Did you enjoy the IAS lecture I saw you at?
Max
MAX
Fri, Aug 1, 2014, 4:14 PM
to person whose email I opened to get the virus
The one TOTALLY AWESOME thing that came out of the hacking
OMG, you have to see what happened from that spam email debacle!!
The girl below was super close friends with me for four weeks in 2010, then she disappeared from the face of the earth.
THEN I got the reply below to the spam ...
Now, she is either making a joke about the quote from Hermione, which wouldn't make a lot of sense ... or ...
SHE IS THROWING SHADE AT ME!!
And it delights me because I still don't know what happened for her to disappear, but obviously it is something I said about boyfriends (neither of us had one at the time, not that it mattered)
AND, she thinks she has insulted me, when she has actually complimented me. And backhand insulted herself by inferring that relationship status is something so important to her that it is open to insult.
MAX
"This address does not accept emails from malicious and discontent spinsters."
Nov 4, 2015
to VF
V - I just wanted to thank you for your excellent reply to this spam email!
The comment has gone on to become a rather fabulous story, and been used to elicit much amusement from my friends.
I have included some screenshots of its starring role in some jokes.
I hope you are having a wonderful day
Max
Sun, Nov 8, 2015
to MAX
Wel it captured the spirit of the intended receipt well, obviously. Otherwise instead it would have to be worded that this email address doesn't accept spam from discontent women who do everything within their power to break up relationships and make accusations that have far-reaching consequences.
Obviously, your actions speak louder than words ever will and the fact you've had to reply nearly a year later proves a case in point to your unhappy life. Now, do fuck off.
MAX
Sun, Nov 8, 2015
to VF
V - have you mistaken me for someone else who actually knew you?
I can't imagine how I could have so much power in your life in less than a handful of meetings and no contact in five years. You literally didn't know me at all then and don't know me since … so why all this anger?
Have you talked to someone about this displacement of your own problems onto complete strangers from the past? It seems not conducive for your own ability to stay happy or healthy.
I hope you are able to find some peace with yourself, because I cannot imagine how your response to my clearly spam email after five years of no contact, and such a quick acquaintance of almost no depth, was warranted.
Although your response was turned to good use, and I have let you know that it continues to live on, so thank you, again, for excellent material!
hacked hacked <vf@hotmail.com>
Sun, Nov 8, 2015
to MAX
Claire, the question is why are you contacting someone whom you don't know and only met a handful of times from five years ago? Very odd and quite honestly disturbing, hence the fuck off.
MAX
Nov 8, 2015
to hacked
Ah, but I didn't contact you, my love, you contacted me over a spam email.
I do have to ask though, what did I say that has such a strong hold over you after so long?
VF
Mon, Nov 9, 2015
to MAX
Re: "This address does not accept emails from malicious and discontent spinsters who attempt to subvert their palpable rage and indignation by continually harassing people they don't know. In such circumstances may one suggest online dating, perhaps?"
MAX
Mon, Nov 9, 2015, 7:53 AM
to VF
Now I think we are getting to the crux of the matter
V
This is very, very intriguing.
All I remember of our last meeting is that we discussed a man I didn't know in passing.
You presented all the pertinent details, and going on the fact that those were the details you told me (since I didn't know the dude), I put forward an opinion based on the facts you told me.
I don't remember the dude, the details or the opinion, I just know I never saw you again.
Until your reply to my spam email, I just assumed we had parted because of natural causes - I remember seeing you at UWA and saying hello because I was happy to see you.
The thing I found most intriguing about your reply to the email is that since you knew me for such a short time, and had not witnessed my life since then, your reply told me more about you than me.
You decided that you wanted to tell me the worst about myself, but you revealed what you hated most about yourself. You don't know my life now, so how could you craft a real insult?
Instead you crafted a really awesome sentence that was about you and some need you have for confession and cleansing.
Now, your replies have been REALLY clear that this is about men, partnerships and some kind of trust issues.
So, some questions:
1. Considering I didn't know the guy talked about, or any of your male friends, how did I affect them in regards to you?
2. Have I subsequently been involved with one of your male friends or partners since? If so, I did not know that they were your partner or friend.
3. If I have been involved with your partner, I can assure you that he was cheating on you, as all my partners are explicitly told I don't sleep with other women's partners unless that partner is with us.
I understand the pain of not having a monogamous male partner when you want one, I see it in my friends all the time, and I wish you well in finding what you want.
Essentially, why I loved your reply, and used it to great comic effect, is because being called a spinster is a great compliment to me, as I have always been and will alway be a spinster.
I am also non-monogamous, heteroflexible and I have a very well ordered and fulfilling sexual life that helps keep my successful writing career on track.
If the well-ordered sex life has hurt you unwittingly on my behalf I do apologise, but I try very hard to screen for cheaters.
All the best with everything going forward.
Max, spinster of the parish (it's a feature, not a bug!)
8 November 2006
THIS is how you do an Engineering Class ...
FRITZ
trollop! you have them eating out of your hand.
I was thinking of you two nights ago actually. I was watching the mummy, and realised finally who Rachael Weisz reminded me of ;-)
MAX
I prefer strumpet or lusty wench thanks. Well, that night I felt a lot like you must have felt when you first met me all those years ago - older, wiser, and so not going there!
Ooooooh, pretty compliment, that I will take with pleasure, thank you, sir. My favourite sayings of hers are:
I bet you're thinking, what's a place like me doing in a girl like this?
and
I'm a Librarian!
What a girl.
Yes, very pretty compliment - cheers.
FRITZ
how do you know when I met you I was "so not going there"? The presumption.
oh the presumption. maybe I thought I never stood a chance and was just protecting myself from rejection by not even trying.
;-P
Yes, she's quite a hottie. You two have the same smile and some similar mannerisms. you're welcome.
MAX
As if life COULDN'T get any more complicated - I went down Hampden Road today and I just *knew* I would see Fritz, because lately everything I expect to happen, bloody happens.
So, there he was. There we stood. There we chatted. I promised to send him an email - I sent him one with an attachment of photos of me and, oh, fifteen young men - that was the bottom email.
The rest is my direct statement technique trying to get out of him what he is after.
Yes, just when I needed the quiet.
Oh, and if that is not enough, I can feel in my BONES that An Old Crush will be wanting to catch up before he goes on the 16th. Friggin' bloody boys
CHE
I just had Jimbo get a bit hot under the collar. Fortunately, he calmed down faced with my implacable ignorance of it.
Me is confused. Did you two ever get it on? was it ever acknowledged/talked about? I haven't seen a Rachael movie, I couldn't say whether he tells the truth.
MAX
Oh, Bugger. I hate it when bosses get angry. Glad you sorted it out though.
Oh, since about 3 months after we met after he told me he knew I liked him and he would never go out with me, there was no further discussion and I dealt with it.
When I got home from London he pulled serious moves on me and I played it blissfully ignorant as if it was all the same as when I left.
He is escalating, he gets physically close - showing me martial arts 'moves' that require some serious groping, when I went to his gig he would get off the stage and sing to me (you should have seen the crusty groupies hate THAT move). And the compliments have been VERY, VERY prolific, even Elbow raises her eyebrows at them.
He is getting frustrated that I am taking his word of 2002 and not trying again. Men are SO predictable.
It's a pity that not trying again because ‘I know that he will be bad for me’ is interpreted now as playing hard to get. Sometimes 32-year-olds cannot keep their mind off jailbait I suppose.
My life is pathetically exciting at the moment. It's like old times, except with a more exhausted Max trying to get off the merry-go-round, but she just can't help herself.
MAX
And for the last five months I have been VERY careful not to let three men at ADI know how close I work to them - Carl, Fritz and Richard. For very good reasons - I can't have the past problems start up because it makes sense for us to meet up for lunch again. I just can't handle it, I really can't.
But I can feel the crash coming, I can feel that there is going to be something that will make life horrendously interesting very near in the future. I can just FEEL karma lining me up for interesting times.
And the weirdest thing is, I have been feeling it for the last two months and each time I expect an escalation, it arrives, and it arrives in style. It is like finally, I have enough experience to feel the currents that lie under the smooth surface of my social web in Perth. It is such a strange feeling, but I am glad I can see it for what it is, at least I have some warning this time.
I dunno, right now I feel a lot like I did when I first got back, that this town will crush me with the weight of the expectations of the people who know me. And no matter how reclusive I have been, even my much-reduced circle of friends is becoming problematic.
You should see the boys when they came in today to see me in dribs and drabs for the first time since last Wednesday - they all knew that I had seen them having a lot of fun - and MAN did they look sheepish. It was VERY, very amusing. Goran was in too, but he was with a group so I couldn't be especially nice to him because it would have been too obvious. But the more I hear about him, the more I wish I had turned him down with more grace than I did.
I have a lot to learn I guess.
Anyway, I am not sure I could pack ANY more adventures into today, but you know, there are still a few more hours before I go to bed. I dunno, I could still run into someone mortifyingly connected to me and top it all off nicely.
Actually, I make a bet now that before tomorrow morning there will be a long email in my inbox from Morgan, because Gidget and I have had some FASCINATING emails and chats today. She read my blog and was very impressed ... I REALLY do like her! :p
*blerg* that is me done for today - over-excited really.
MAX
Anyway, I am not sure I could pack ANY more adventures into today, but you know, there are still a few more hours before I go to bed. I dunno, I could still run into someone mortifyingly connected to me and top it all off nicely.
Yup, prophetic words. Stayed in the office until 9 and rang Elbow and was sending her photos of last Wednesday when she suddenly recognised one of the boys draped over me! It was a classmate of Timbon AND he used to go to Mass at the Cathedral each Sunday with us for years ... I am really quite entertained ... I knew he was vaguely familiar, it's just the last time I saw him he was about 15.
It is pretty mortifying now to see the photo of him kissing my cheek and to re-read the cheeky emails we have been exchanging since Wednesday (all above board needless to say, but certainly cheeky) and think that we are VERY old acquaintances. A brilliantly embarrassing end to an incredibly Perth day.
8 November 2004
This weekend I went to Paris again to help a friend celebrate her birthday and because her boyfriend was in America and there was a free bed. It was so nice to be back in such a short time – seeing her again, drinking on Rue du Lappe for two nights in a row, travelling metro lines that were now familiar and seeing the roofs, spires and statues that were so fresh last visit and seem homely the second time.
The visit was perhaps slightly better than the first one as I was not sick, I knew the ropes and I got to talk to and party with young people that knew Paris better than I did. Her friends were mostly English with a smattering of Vietnamese, Canadians Germans and Greeks, and they were all there for placements in their University language degrees. This was great, not only for the fact I again had translators for more effortless communication, but the company was well travelled and very intelligent.
On Friday we went to Versailles, spending an hour in the State Apartments and three hours in the gardens. The gardens were quite an adventure as we meandered in circles trying to see most the vast grounds. We spent an inordinate amount of time in the Queen's Hamlet – a custom-built village in the grounds with fantastically quaint houses, canals, bridges, vegetable gardens and fields. It was basically a full-scale dolls village and we were so enchanted we made grand plans to rent it out and have a dress-up weekend party. We miscalculated the time somewhat and had to head back across half the garden in the dusk and settling dark, which was a cold and dark journey that rewarded us with the spectacular sight of the palace illuminated for the night.
On Saturday we went shopping. Or rather I went shopping. There is only one purchase I can confirm and that was the completion of my holy mission for both my trips to Paris – the purchase of the ultimate pair of black boots. Photo attached. Aren't they LUVVERLY?
Saturday night was her party and we went out to a superb and fantastically cheap meal and then out to their local, Rue du Lappe for late-night drinks. We ended up in a funky, red velvet upholstered bar with a bar whose lights hung under lampshades of cymbals that were set swaying and chiming by bartenders with drumsticks. True to form, when in another country all together I was chatted up by a rather cute Irishman. Can't escape 'em.
Sunday all the Parisien attractions and museums were free, so we went to Musee D'Orsay and due to limited time we decided on the Impressionists and the Art Nouveau galleries. I got to stand in front of glowing Renoirs, halcyon Monets and walls covered in vibrant Toulouse-Lautrec sketches. The Art Nouveau galleries were filled with gorgeous furniture that was so gracefully shaped it looked more grown from than carved from the wood.
The visit was perhaps slightly better than the first one as I was not sick, I knew the ropes and I got to talk to and party with young people that knew Paris better than I did. Her friends were mostly English with a smattering of Vietnamese, Canadians Germans and Greeks, and they were all there for placements in their University language degrees. This was great, not only for the fact I again had translators for more effortless communication, but the company was well travelled and very intelligent.
On Friday we went to Versailles, spending an hour in the State Apartments and three hours in the gardens. The gardens were quite an adventure as we meandered in circles trying to see most the vast grounds. We spent an inordinate amount of time in the Queen's Hamlet – a custom-built village in the grounds with fantastically quaint houses, canals, bridges, vegetable gardens and fields. It was basically a full-scale dolls village and we were so enchanted we made grand plans to rent it out and have a dress-up weekend party. We miscalculated the time somewhat and had to head back across half the garden in the dusk and settling dark, which was a cold and dark journey that rewarded us with the spectacular sight of the palace illuminated for the night.
On Saturday we went shopping. Or rather I went shopping. There is only one purchase I can confirm and that was the completion of my holy mission for both my trips to Paris – the purchase of the ultimate pair of black boots. Photo attached. Aren't they LUVVERLY?
Saturday night was her party and we went out to a superb and fantastically cheap meal and then out to their local, Rue du Lappe for late-night drinks. We ended up in a funky, red velvet upholstered bar with a bar whose lights hung under lampshades of cymbals that were set swaying and chiming by bartenders with drumsticks. True to form, when in another country all together I was chatted up by a rather cute Irishman. Can't escape 'em.
Sunday all the Parisien attractions and museums were free, so we went to Musee D'Orsay and due to limited time we decided on the Impressionists and the Art Nouveau galleries. I got to stand in front of glowing Renoirs, halcyon Monets and walls covered in vibrant Toulouse-Lautrec sketches. The Art Nouveau galleries were filled with gorgeous furniture that was so gracefully shaped it looked more grown from than carved from the wood.
Thursday, November 07, 2019
7 November 2008
the long reach of barack obama
hey,
as all of you know, i'm not really the one for mass emails, but today was too good not to share:
north atlantic council sat today in a special session to meet, for the first time ever, the secretary-general of the arab league, amr moussa began his speech by announcing that, as far as he is concerned, the 21st century started yesterday, then spoke eloquently about 'change', and finally looked around the room and said: 'because i indeed do believe that yes, we can'.
an arab diplomat taking the message of the future black president of the united states to nato - so unreal it almost makes me afraid that i'll wake up tomorrow morning and sarah palin will be in the white house.
to everyone i haven't been in touch with lately (which means pretty much everyone), i'm very sorry and i'll try to do something about it soon ... I haven't forgotten you, just got a bit overwhelmed with organising exhibitions of military technology on one hand and on the other trying to convince the registry b*****s that letting me own a floppy disk would not constitute breach of security...
i hope life is treating you well,
love
hey,
as all of you know, i'm not really the one for mass emails, but today was too good not to share:
north atlantic council sat today in a special session to meet, for the first time ever, the secretary-general of the arab league, amr moussa began his speech by announcing that, as far as he is concerned, the 21st century started yesterday, then spoke eloquently about 'change', and finally looked around the room and said: 'because i indeed do believe that yes, we can'.
an arab diplomat taking the message of the future black president of the united states to nato - so unreal it almost makes me afraid that i'll wake up tomorrow morning and sarah palin will be in the white house.
to everyone i haven't been in touch with lately (which means pretty much everyone), i'm very sorry and i'll try to do something about it soon ... I haven't forgotten you, just got a bit overwhelmed with organising exhibitions of military technology on one hand and on the other trying to convince the registry b*****s that letting me own a floppy disk would not constitute breach of security...
i hope life is treating you well,
love
Wednesday, November 06, 2019
6 November 2014
I like to hear that people who have lived their own lives are able to find partners who have done similarly to spend lots of time with.
I like to hear that women who have lived their own lives are able to find partners who have done similarly to spend lots of time with.
It is confusing when I hear that women who have lived their own lives are suddenly invisible because of the job their partner has.
Many thanks to a Human Rights Lawyer and a Theatre Director (whom I don't actually know, but have read much about) for demonstrating this phenomenon this year.
Rhys: What phenomenon? Have read and Reread and see they have changed people with woman but don't see what the phenomenon is.
Max: Ah, Rhys, people are teasing me by forwarding articles about a certain engagement, but I am noticing a trend in how the articles about the engagement are written.
The articles about this engagement between two English Theatre Luvvies focuses on the fame of the actor, instead of the cross-disciplinary talent and hard work of the director.
It reminds me of the Human Rights lawyer who married an actor this year, and because of his fame her dresses become the story, not her successes.
Rhys: All the articles I have read have talked about her credentials as well as his (lol my articles are in ok magazine). I thought u were quoting something
Max: Do any of the articles have the following heading? I am trying to find one ... please let there be one ...
Sophie Hunter and Benedict Cumberbatch announce Engagement.
Rhys: I will have a look in my recent mag and let you know.
Max: This shit makes me so tired. This single article that lists Sophie Hunter first is still found wanting in the 'be respectful to Sophie Hunter, her life is not of interest now simply for who she is engaged to' areas, but at least they write about her at the start of some of the sentences, you know, as if she is a subject, not an object.
Language is so important.
Max: THIS is going some way towards correct reporting
Sophie Hunter And Benedict Cumberbatch Announce Engagement Through Classified Ad
I like to hear that women who have lived their own lives are able to find partners who have done similarly to spend lots of time with.
It is confusing when I hear that women who have lived their own lives are suddenly invisible because of the job their partner has.
Many thanks to a Human Rights Lawyer and a Theatre Director (whom I don't actually know, but have read much about) for demonstrating this phenomenon this year.
Rhys: What phenomenon? Have read and Reread and see they have changed people with woman but don't see what the phenomenon is.
Max: Ah, Rhys, people are teasing me by forwarding articles about a certain engagement, but I am noticing a trend in how the articles about the engagement are written.
The articles about this engagement between two English Theatre Luvvies focuses on the fame of the actor, instead of the cross-disciplinary talent and hard work of the director.
It reminds me of the Human Rights lawyer who married an actor this year, and because of his fame her dresses become the story, not her successes.
Rhys: All the articles I have read have talked about her credentials as well as his (lol my articles are in ok magazine). I thought u were quoting something
Max: Do any of the articles have the following heading? I am trying to find one ... please let there be one ...
Sophie Hunter and Benedict Cumberbatch announce Engagement.
Rhys: I will have a look in my recent mag and let you know.
Max: This shit makes me so tired. This single article that lists Sophie Hunter first is still found wanting in the 'be respectful to Sophie Hunter, her life is not of interest now simply for who she is engaged to' areas, but at least they write about her at the start of some of the sentences, you know, as if she is a subject, not an object.
Language is so important.
Max: THIS is going some way towards correct reporting
Sophie Hunter And Benedict Cumberbatch Announce Engagement Through Classified Ad
Tuesday, November 05, 2019
5 November 2013
Child Max is going on school camp tomorrow, and you know what happens to children on the night before school camp right?
Cousin (Formerly Unknown): They get tied up and spanked?
Max: Usually they can't sleep from excitement, get sick and can't go to camp for the first day, thus missing out on all the other campers getting bunks next to friends so when you turn up the second day the bunk you get is next to people who just don't like you and the week is spent composing parody songs like …
Cousin (Formerly Unknown): What kind of childhood did YOU have?
Max: Hahahaha, not one as ... restrained ... as yours, clearly ...
Cousin (Formerly Unknown): I didn't say anyone ever smacked me
Cousin (Formerly Unknown): They get tied up and spanked?
Max: Usually they can't sleep from excitement, get sick and can't go to camp for the first day, thus missing out on all the other campers getting bunks next to friends so when you turn up the second day the bunk you get is next to people who just don't like you and the week is spent composing parody songs like …
Hello Mummo, Hello Daddo
Here I am at Camp Sorrento
I am tired, I am sleepy
And a girl in my dorm is quite sickie
Tuesday Arvo Mrs Harvo
Went iceskating, oh bravo!
What a pity we did see
Those people skinny dipping in the sea
Year Eight Camp, Sorrento, 1994
Cousin (Formerly Unknown): What kind of childhood did YOU have?
Max: Hahahaha, not one as ... restrained ... as yours, clearly ...
Cousin (Formerly Unknown): I didn't say anyone ever smacked me
5 November 2012
FAWKES
Today I came to the realisation that I'm being played in a game without even knowing that the game ever existed.
It's been brought to my attention that I'm not playing the game as I'm expected to. I'm not responding to the body language, word choice and manipulation as I should. The game is founded on reverse psychology and manipulation, and I'm reacting to the game in a literal, logical and straight forward manner. Unknown to me, I've challenged the game, and therefore the game has intensified.
Today I was introduced to the game rule book and, therefore, today I commence learning about the game. My intention is not to play the game but to know when the game is being played on me. My intention is to expose the game and to bring the game to a close.
WRIGHT
Today I watched realisation spread across the face of a woman in a relationship, a realisation that came from one simple idea. The Game is alive and well in my life, and in hers. It is not being run somewhere else in the world, written about in hip magazines and happening to other women. It was being used to manipulate a woman I actually knew.
So I went to find a copy of The Game, a book I had only read about. After a cursory glance at the Self-Help section in my favourite bookshop, I was forced to ask for its location.
The owner took me to the Sex/Erotica Section (Under Gay/Lesbian and right next to the only real Porn in the shop) and felt obliged to explain:
"We put it in the Erotica section because 9 out of 10 people who buy it are men. And they do not go to the Self Help/Relationship section for something like this. So we put it here, with the rest of the books on sex."
I must have looked so shocked he actually repeated himself, to make sure I understood.
When I bought the book he very kindly wrapped it in brown paper, as if it was real porn. You know the kind - exploitative, destructive and misogynist. I think he knows something, something that I am about to find out for myself.
5 November 2005
First off, Yallingup sounds GREAT! As you know i have no plans, but i DID pick up a pair of speedos over here to swim in, so I will not have to go in the nuddy till i find a bikini.
Did I tell you why I needed bathers? We stayed overnight in a maharaja's palace and he had a swimming pool! I know that sounds like a story, but he was the 'marj' of a small town called Jojowa (in the desert) and the palace was a gorgeous, square C19th british raj style house. The marj was mad and picked us up from the bus station in a battered jeep. He drove like the devil and carelessly hit one of the millions of wild dogs of no particular breed that litter the streets. There are pictures of him from childhood in the rooms, black and whites of a very serious little boy with a severe part, shorts and knee socks.
We are in Calcutta, our tour ended officially last night. We had a big dinner at the best restaurant in the city. That sounds like a brag, but it only cost me 10 pounds for a mocktail, an entree and main. I had fish (protein! At last!) stuffed with asparagus and spinach and potato and it was one of the best things i've eaten.
When i get back i will have a curry night - i did a cooking class and learned how to make real, proper curry and it is soooo unlike the woman's weekly 1970s era curry i have previously known.
Our last stop before calcutta was Varanasi, and its definitely a place i want to return to. Its the holiest place in India, along the banks of the Ganges. Apparently, it was weighed up against heaven and was so heavy with holiness that it sank and heaven floated.
People believe that the Ganges can wash away your sins, cure your ailments, and if you are burned on the river, you miss a few reincarnations and get a bit closer to heaven. SO all of life is lived on the ghats - the steps leading down to the river. People bathing, clothes being washed and beaten, fishing, mysterious priests from the Brahmin caste debating, giving astrological advice, like when to get married or what name to give your child. People begging, people praying - the temple is an open space which looks to the river. The river IS the temple. Then there are the burning ghats - a sort of 24-hour crematorium. It is very special to die and then be bathed in the water, cremated on a pyre and have your ashes released into the water. Death here is not mourned, its an everyday thing, and happens right in the middle of the ghats.
We went on a little boat as the sun rose and then again when it set and saw everything, EVERYTHING that life is about in this little microcosm. It was pretty amazing.
Ok, phew that's me done for a while.
Tonight we are going to see another bollywood movie. we saw 'Don' last week and although it was mostly in hindi, I could still follow the story. I bought the soundtrack to which you must listen to! Kareena Kapoor did a racy little dance in a gold dress which had all the best bollywood dance moves - the lightbulb, stepping on cockroach ... I don't know what they're really called but I will demonstrate.
I can't believe i will be home next week! I went to a club last night called 'the underground' which was funny. Boys on one side, girls on the other till a Hindi song came on and they all fought for the dance floor to do the aforementioned dance moves! Anyways, the underground's theme was London and there was a huge tube map. I saw chancery lane, holborn and was a little bit sad! I thought 'I caught the tube every day by myself ... that is so much cooler than perth' and so my discontent has begun.
I am looking forward to coming home (a little bit) if only to meet all the men in your life. Goran is gorgeous! So is him, but you already know i think that. Let me judge him by my impression of his personality though. Your description of the party is funny. I love nights like that, where you are the most fascinating thing ever. Good for your ego, good for your health.
Anyway, I have changed my flight so I leave from Calcutta (don't want to leg it back to Delhi) so I will be returning a day earlier. I haven't told my parents yet as i am waiting for the airline to confirm it, so if you see them it may come as a surprise! I will call them tomorrow anyway.
So, perhaps the next time we will correspond will be when I 'hallooo' you from my back garden?
Have a great monday!
xxx cha chi
(Hindi for aunty, which is also a term of respect)
Did I tell you why I needed bathers? We stayed overnight in a maharaja's palace and he had a swimming pool! I know that sounds like a story, but he was the 'marj' of a small town called Jojowa (in the desert) and the palace was a gorgeous, square C19th british raj style house. The marj was mad and picked us up from the bus station in a battered jeep. He drove like the devil and carelessly hit one of the millions of wild dogs of no particular breed that litter the streets. There are pictures of him from childhood in the rooms, black and whites of a very serious little boy with a severe part, shorts and knee socks.
We are in Calcutta, our tour ended officially last night. We had a big dinner at the best restaurant in the city. That sounds like a brag, but it only cost me 10 pounds for a mocktail, an entree and main. I had fish (protein! At last!) stuffed with asparagus and spinach and potato and it was one of the best things i've eaten.
When i get back i will have a curry night - i did a cooking class and learned how to make real, proper curry and it is soooo unlike the woman's weekly 1970s era curry i have previously known.
Our last stop before calcutta was Varanasi, and its definitely a place i want to return to. Its the holiest place in India, along the banks of the Ganges. Apparently, it was weighed up against heaven and was so heavy with holiness that it sank and heaven floated.
People believe that the Ganges can wash away your sins, cure your ailments, and if you are burned on the river, you miss a few reincarnations and get a bit closer to heaven. SO all of life is lived on the ghats - the steps leading down to the river. People bathing, clothes being washed and beaten, fishing, mysterious priests from the Brahmin caste debating, giving astrological advice, like when to get married or what name to give your child. People begging, people praying - the temple is an open space which looks to the river. The river IS the temple. Then there are the burning ghats - a sort of 24-hour crematorium. It is very special to die and then be bathed in the water, cremated on a pyre and have your ashes released into the water. Death here is not mourned, its an everyday thing, and happens right in the middle of the ghats.
We went on a little boat as the sun rose and then again when it set and saw everything, EVERYTHING that life is about in this little microcosm. It was pretty amazing.
Ok, phew that's me done for a while.
Tonight we are going to see another bollywood movie. we saw 'Don' last week and although it was mostly in hindi, I could still follow the story. I bought the soundtrack to which you must listen to! Kareena Kapoor did a racy little dance in a gold dress which had all the best bollywood dance moves - the lightbulb, stepping on cockroach ... I don't know what they're really called but I will demonstrate.
I can't believe i will be home next week! I went to a club last night called 'the underground' which was funny. Boys on one side, girls on the other till a Hindi song came on and they all fought for the dance floor to do the aforementioned dance moves! Anyways, the underground's theme was London and there was a huge tube map. I saw chancery lane, holborn and was a little bit sad! I thought 'I caught the tube every day by myself ... that is so much cooler than perth' and so my discontent has begun.
I am looking forward to coming home (a little bit) if only to meet all the men in your life. Goran is gorgeous! So is him, but you already know i think that. Let me judge him by my impression of his personality though. Your description of the party is funny. I love nights like that, where you are the most fascinating thing ever. Good for your ego, good for your health.
Anyway, I have changed my flight so I leave from Calcutta (don't want to leg it back to Delhi) so I will be returning a day earlier. I haven't told my parents yet as i am waiting for the airline to confirm it, so if you see them it may come as a surprise! I will call them tomorrow anyway.
So, perhaps the next time we will correspond will be when I 'hallooo' you from my back garden?
Have a great monday!
xxx cha chi
(Hindi for aunty, which is also a term of respect)
Monday, November 04, 2019
4 November 2011
Games Night! SCANTILY CLAD YOUNG MEN UPDATE
MAX TO HOST, JAY, OTHER PLAYERS, MVP OF THE DAY
Good afternoon Ladies
I am looking forward to the cigar-and-whisky-soaked promise of Saturday, but I was wondering if Stevo had been invited?
http://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/my-self-portrait
Because he exists!
MVP OF THE DAY TO MAX, HOST
Max
My friend, I have a rather worrying update on the Stevo front.
Stevo is now on the Interpol most wanted list after trying to pass himself off as Max Middleton (Ma'am) at a charity function at the Mayfair Hotel, London, last week. I believe there was a rather nasty incident with a tray of canapés which resulted in Stevo slipping, falling over a rather elderly lady (I can confirm not the Queen, God bless her) and unveiling his manhood in front of the gathered crowd. As you can imagine panic ensued.
As far as I can ascertain from my sources he is now in hiding and racing across the continents, at an alarming rate, in various guises such as Louis XIV, Albert Einstein, Aphrodite, Benny Hill. The flaw in his plan to date would appear to be that all these people are dead and the powdered wig of Louis my attract some negative attention in inner-city Bangalore.
However, intelligence suggests that Stevo is attempting to return to his birthplace and may appear in disguise at the forthcoming cards evening. We must be on our guard for imposters.
As ever your Semper Vigilo friend.
HOST TO MVP OF THE DAY, MAX
snicker
HOST TO MVP OF THE DAY, MAX
Ok don't get too excited girls but there may be an actual man in the house on Saturday night.
My friend Ken just told me he is coming to town and naturally will be staying with me.
He is a poker fan and I have told him he can play with us ... I haven't broken it to him yet that he will be playing the role of half-naked man-servant / scantily-clad arm-candy ... but I'm sure he'll oblige, if only for a moment or two.
Now I haven't told anyone else yet and I'm not even sure he'll be there, he may decide to go elsewhere on his days off.
Anyway, something to think about ...
MAX TO HOST, MVP OF THE DAY, JAY
Thank you for your timely report on the fugitive, Ms Valuable. I appreciate the time and effort that went into putting together the brief on such a nefarious man.
The International Intelligence Community (don't laugh, it exists) have noticed some rather interesting items going missing in a trail leading across continents straight towards Kalgoorlie.
In Normandy, some of the best Camembert producers have noted that the best wheels of this most delicious of cheeses have rolled straight out of storehouses across the region. They are resigned to the loss of the cheese but would love to know how the perpetrator got past their famous Guard Geese.
In Austria, the Vienna Opera House would like to confirm how a brace of their best plush red velvet couches was spirited out of their foyer WHILE it was chock-full of the glitterati of Vienna fundraising to combat Poverty in Africa. Some patrons admitted they saw the couches disappear out windows with no visible support, but thought it was an artistic flourish by the organisers.
Various very irate men with Middle Eastern accents have been contacting everyone they can get a phone number for in the International Community to complain about a beautiful woman travelling through the Middle East on a motorised clamshell, using only her long golden hair to cover her nakedness. These gentlemen (they are no longer contactable to provide more details seeing as they are mostly dead or in court) have claimed that the extraordinary beauty of the lady concerned has driven the men of their country to revolt against their rule. Our informants call her The Western Devil, the men of their country call her The Arab Spring – apparently she is also collecting baklava and samovars from every man that declares eternal allegiance to her.
The Indians are COMPLETELY unimpressed with a small, energetic Englishman racing around their country chasing their women and claiming that the British Raj was the best era India ever saw. They have literally kicked him off the continent, but are demanding the return of the 100 camels he managed to smuggle into the pockets of his capacious Tweed Jacket before they got rid of him.
So we are looking out for Stevo and a caravan of the sub-continents best camels carrying some really lovely couches, wheels of delicious cheese, the best Turkish coffee and tea brewed for just the right amount of time and baklava that will make you cry with happiness. We expect him to parachute into Kalgoorlie with his loot sometime around 2pm on Saturday, using the arrival of the Prospector to cover the sudden influx of goods and animals from the authorities.
Our best officer, Agent Ken, is monitoring the situation, but for our part, we must be aware (not alert, there are too many lerts around …)
HOST TO MAX, MVP OF THE DAY
bahahahahaa
MAX TO HOST, JAY, OTHER PLAYERS, MVP OF THE DAY
Good afternoon Ladies
I am looking forward to the cigar-and-whisky-soaked promise of Saturday, but I was wondering if Stevo had been invited?
http://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/my-self-portrait
Because he exists!
MVP OF THE DAY TO MAX, HOST
Max
My friend, I have a rather worrying update on the Stevo front.
Stevo is now on the Interpol most wanted list after trying to pass himself off as Max Middleton (Ma'am) at a charity function at the Mayfair Hotel, London, last week. I believe there was a rather nasty incident with a tray of canapés which resulted in Stevo slipping, falling over a rather elderly lady (I can confirm not the Queen, God bless her) and unveiling his manhood in front of the gathered crowd. As you can imagine panic ensued.
As far as I can ascertain from my sources he is now in hiding and racing across the continents, at an alarming rate, in various guises such as Louis XIV, Albert Einstein, Aphrodite, Benny Hill. The flaw in his plan to date would appear to be that all these people are dead and the powdered wig of Louis my attract some negative attention in inner-city Bangalore.
However, intelligence suggests that Stevo is attempting to return to his birthplace and may appear in disguise at the forthcoming cards evening. We must be on our guard for imposters.
As ever your Semper Vigilo friend.
HOST TO MVP OF THE DAY, MAX
snicker
HOST TO MVP OF THE DAY, MAX
Ok don't get too excited girls but there may be an actual man in the house on Saturday night.
My friend Ken just told me he is coming to town and naturally will be staying with me.
He is a poker fan and I have told him he can play with us ... I haven't broken it to him yet that he will be playing the role of half-naked man-servant / scantily-clad arm-candy ... but I'm sure he'll oblige, if only for a moment or two.
Now I haven't told anyone else yet and I'm not even sure he'll be there, he may decide to go elsewhere on his days off.
Anyway, something to think about ...
MAX TO HOST, MVP OF THE DAY, JAY
Thank you for your timely report on the fugitive, Ms Valuable. I appreciate the time and effort that went into putting together the brief on such a nefarious man.
The International Intelligence Community (don't laugh, it exists) have noticed some rather interesting items going missing in a trail leading across continents straight towards Kalgoorlie.
In Normandy, some of the best Camembert producers have noted that the best wheels of this most delicious of cheeses have rolled straight out of storehouses across the region. They are resigned to the loss of the cheese but would love to know how the perpetrator got past their famous Guard Geese.
In Austria, the Vienna Opera House would like to confirm how a brace of their best plush red velvet couches was spirited out of their foyer WHILE it was chock-full of the glitterati of Vienna fundraising to combat Poverty in Africa. Some patrons admitted they saw the couches disappear out windows with no visible support, but thought it was an artistic flourish by the organisers.
Various very irate men with Middle Eastern accents have been contacting everyone they can get a phone number for in the International Community to complain about a beautiful woman travelling through the Middle East on a motorised clamshell, using only her long golden hair to cover her nakedness. These gentlemen (they are no longer contactable to provide more details seeing as they are mostly dead or in court) have claimed that the extraordinary beauty of the lady concerned has driven the men of their country to revolt against their rule. Our informants call her The Western Devil, the men of their country call her The Arab Spring – apparently she is also collecting baklava and samovars from every man that declares eternal allegiance to her.
The Indians are COMPLETELY unimpressed with a small, energetic Englishman racing around their country chasing their women and claiming that the British Raj was the best era India ever saw. They have literally kicked him off the continent, but are demanding the return of the 100 camels he managed to smuggle into the pockets of his capacious Tweed Jacket before they got rid of him.
So we are looking out for Stevo and a caravan of the sub-continents best camels carrying some really lovely couches, wheels of delicious cheese, the best Turkish coffee and tea brewed for just the right amount of time and baklava that will make you cry with happiness. We expect him to parachute into Kalgoorlie with his loot sometime around 2pm on Saturday, using the arrival of the Prospector to cover the sudden influx of goods and animals from the authorities.
Our best officer, Agent Ken, is monitoring the situation, but for our part, we must be aware (not alert, there are too many lerts around …)
HOST TO MAX, MVP OF THE DAY
bahahahahaa
Sunday, November 03, 2019
3 November 2006
I’m really thinking that he is going to be too much for me. I will not have the time nor the application to rule him. He will have to rule himself in my favour, thus it is his call all the way. I am pretty much over the long-term thing, the thinking about him constantly thing.
As for keeping him anywhere near me for a significant length of time, the only thing I have going there is not chasing him.
Let’s look at this objectively:
He is good looking, charming, fast-talking, well connected and obviously wealthy.
He is an alpha male by family, brains, looks, sport, career and by being a sweet guy.
He knows it – while he is not malicious with it, he lets himself off the leash quite a bit.
He is drowning in girls, friends and strangers, and I get the distinct feeling that he is a little evil and keeps them all just far enough away that they know that he would if he could but he won’t so they hope.
He has travelled, but not worked in a corporate environment, so he is cocky, and has not yet had to toe the line, flex his muscles or get put in his place.
He reminds me of me.
So, what have I got going for me? Well, half the reason I think I am ok at the moment is that on Wednesday night I not only saw the way he operated, which I am very familiar and comfortable with, but I know that I was about as effective as him in my own way. Very effective with his class (and the Ford Racing Team pickup was rather good too Bell, well done), perhaps less effective than him in the social arena. But then, I don’t intend to make that the battleground.
No, the battleground will be carefully negotiated by my good self each time he contacts me. And he only gets one reply to each sally, I will not be building on anything. He has to do the building, the sallying, the contacting, he has to make the calls. And I am ok with that because, in the end, I know that I cannot afford to watch him next year.
Thing is, I am not staying single for him, not on your life! Especially because I need to keep the physical feelings in their place.
The aim? Well, to be perfectly honest I want to be the girl he can’t beat, the girl he can’t make dance, the girl who walks away from him in her own time, the girl for whom he is one of many applicants. *heh*
There are a few other aims as well – I want to get his shirt off, I want a snog, I want an admission that he likes me, I want my fingers behind his belt buckle and I want him to have to beg for it.
I won’t be running after him. A Bell has better things to do with her time!
As for keeping him anywhere near me for a significant length of time, the only thing I have going there is not chasing him.
Let’s look at this objectively:
He is good looking, charming, fast-talking, well connected and obviously wealthy.
He is an alpha male by family, brains, looks, sport, career and by being a sweet guy.
He knows it – while he is not malicious with it, he lets himself off the leash quite a bit.
He is drowning in girls, friends and strangers, and I get the distinct feeling that he is a little evil and keeps them all just far enough away that they know that he would if he could but he won’t so they hope.
He has travelled, but not worked in a corporate environment, so he is cocky, and has not yet had to toe the line, flex his muscles or get put in his place.
He reminds me of me.
So, what have I got going for me? Well, half the reason I think I am ok at the moment is that on Wednesday night I not only saw the way he operated, which I am very familiar and comfortable with, but I know that I was about as effective as him in my own way. Very effective with his class (and the Ford Racing Team pickup was rather good too Bell, well done), perhaps less effective than him in the social arena. But then, I don’t intend to make that the battleground.
No, the battleground will be carefully negotiated by my good self each time he contacts me. And he only gets one reply to each sally, I will not be building on anything. He has to do the building, the sallying, the contacting, he has to make the calls. And I am ok with that because, in the end, I know that I cannot afford to watch him next year.
Thing is, I am not staying single for him, not on your life! Especially because I need to keep the physical feelings in their place.
The aim? Well, to be perfectly honest I want to be the girl he can’t beat, the girl he can’t make dance, the girl who walks away from him in her own time, the girl for whom he is one of many applicants. *heh*
There are a few other aims as well – I want to get his shirt off, I want a snog, I want an admission that he likes me, I want my fingers behind his belt buckle and I want him to have to beg for it.
I won’t be running after him. A Bell has better things to do with her time!
3 November 2005
Rhys' Predictions
- Max will be back in Perth mid-2005 or 2006 (true)
- She will have her first encounter with an Englishman October 2003 (close, Angel was 23 Sept)
- Upon her return, she will be bringing back the man of her dreams with a thick accent (I wish)
- The first 6 months will be the hardest - can't seem to find the ideal job, and you are getting by with the occasional temping job (not quite, first and last six months the easiest, middle twelve months the hardest)
- Feb-Mar 2004 you land your "dream job" at a publishing house - however starting at "grunt level" (nope, Feb-Mar 2005 I landed my dream job)
- Your wallet/valuables will be stolen mid-2004 (not my material valuables, just my best friend in London!)
- You will backpack for a period of 6 months however you will prefer staying central to London (nope, discovered early that I was not a good backpacker!)
- You will have five brushes with the famous (good guess! Spencer McLaren, Anthony Stewart Head, Princess Anne, Michael of Kent, etc - REAL brushes only one, more like ten when it is just sightings)
I think that was pretty damn good!
- Max will be back in Perth mid-2005 or 2006 (true)
- She will have her first encounter with an Englishman October 2003 (close, Angel was 23 Sept)
- Upon her return, she will be bringing back the man of her dreams with a thick accent (I wish)
- The first 6 months will be the hardest - can't seem to find the ideal job, and you are getting by with the occasional temping job (not quite, first and last six months the easiest, middle twelve months the hardest)
- Feb-Mar 2004 you land your "dream job" at a publishing house - however starting at "grunt level" (nope, Feb-Mar 2005 I landed my dream job)
- Your wallet/valuables will be stolen mid-2004 (not my material valuables, just my best friend in London!)
- You will backpack for a period of 6 months however you will prefer staying central to London (nope, discovered early that I was not a good backpacker!)
- You will have five brushes with the famous (good guess! Spencer McLaren, Anthony Stewart Head, Princess Anne, Michael of Kent, etc - REAL brushes only one, more like ten when it is just sightings)
I think that was pretty damn good!
3 November 2004
once upon time there was a little tree
it grew up to be a big tree
it got chopped down for paper manufacturing
bits of the tree ended up as money
some as movie tickets
some as a CD sleeve
some as a piece paper over which two architects touched hands, then lips
and finally got it together
let's make that tree happy eh? :)
as Kylie would say - more, more, more, gotta give it all up for love babe!
but seriously, you are like a blooming rollercoaster with this affair. a very amusing rollercoaster granted, but dizzying all the same! I laughed so hard when I heard that you felt sorry for the trees :) Trees are a loving species, they would be happy to give it all up for love ...
as for your idea that you will give him his birthday kiss, well, I feel inspiration stirring
it was the sunday after his birthday party and Tree Lover was feeling strangely flat
the party had been good but it had been more of the same wordless staring and awkward half-touches
too many people looking, too many things to do as host, too many people wanting the birthday boy's time
the concept of alone time at his party, especially enough to get some quality intimacy was doomed from the start really
various brunettes were sprawled around Wifey's room, Wifey nursing a throbbing head - she'd mixed her drinks because Orlando had been plying her with all things alcoholic - Sister and Max trying to photoshop Carl's head onto Henning's body
they *were* trying to get her out of her blue funk but nothing was really working
by three pm the surprisingly clear sky and Max and Wifey's sudden spurt of enthusiasm for movement saw the girls on the DLR to Greenwich to tramp around the Observatory
swathed sulkily in a scarf (hers) and jumper (Sister's), Tree Lover was hanging behind the others as they roamed the hilly gardens, kicking at stones and clumps of grass with her sneakers (Sister's ... no, I think these are mine)
the other three yelled at her to hurry up and in her pique she tossed her head away like a shying horse and her eyes landed on a tall figure striding down the hill towards her
she would recognise him anywhere, despite those hands clad in gloves and the unusually confident stride as those long legs navigated the slope and uneven ground
who would have thought that once out of the office and away from eyes he would be so imposing and direct?
who would have thought that he would hit the flat ground and bear down on a girl like a runaway train?
who would have thought that a genuine height difference would matter so little?
who would have thought it?
it grew up to be a big tree
it got chopped down for paper manufacturing
bits of the tree ended up as money
some as movie tickets
some as a CD sleeve
some as a piece paper over which two architects touched hands, then lips
and finally got it together
let's make that tree happy eh? :)
as Kylie would say - more, more, more, gotta give it all up for love babe!
but seriously, you are like a blooming rollercoaster with this affair. a very amusing rollercoaster granted, but dizzying all the same! I laughed so hard when I heard that you felt sorry for the trees :) Trees are a loving species, they would be happy to give it all up for love ...
as for your idea that you will give him his birthday kiss, well, I feel inspiration stirring
it was the sunday after his birthday party and Tree Lover was feeling strangely flat
the party had been good but it had been more of the same wordless staring and awkward half-touches
too many people looking, too many things to do as host, too many people wanting the birthday boy's time
the concept of alone time at his party, especially enough to get some quality intimacy was doomed from the start really
various brunettes were sprawled around Wifey's room, Wifey nursing a throbbing head - she'd mixed her drinks because Orlando had been plying her with all things alcoholic - Sister and Max trying to photoshop Carl's head onto Henning's body
they *were* trying to get her out of her blue funk but nothing was really working
by three pm the surprisingly clear sky and Max and Wifey's sudden spurt of enthusiasm for movement saw the girls on the DLR to Greenwich to tramp around the Observatory
swathed sulkily in a scarf (hers) and jumper (Sister's), Tree Lover was hanging behind the others as they roamed the hilly gardens, kicking at stones and clumps of grass with her sneakers (Sister's ... no, I think these are mine)
the other three yelled at her to hurry up and in her pique she tossed her head away like a shying horse and her eyes landed on a tall figure striding down the hill towards her
she would recognise him anywhere, despite those hands clad in gloves and the unusually confident stride as those long legs navigated the slope and uneven ground
who would have thought that once out of the office and away from eyes he would be so imposing and direct?
who would have thought that he would hit the flat ground and bear down on a girl like a runaway train?
who would have thought that a genuine height difference would matter so little?
who would have thought it?
Saturday, November 02, 2019
2 November 2015
CAS
Hello my love,
Happy Monday!
So, I took your advice and contacted my ‘slut’ on Saturday. We conversed for a bit and he said that he’d be finished work at 9.30, an invitation I asked? Perhaps was his remark. In the end I didn’t see him, it’s all too hard and I can’t be bothered.
Matt, we’ll I’ve asked him over twice now, Friday it just didn’t happen and then Saturday he didn’t finish until after 1pm, so I can forgive that. It’s just weird is all…
So anyhoos popped back on Tinder yesterday and was matched with a guy called Brian, who I later found out is irish, I was hoping that his accent would be crap, so I could at least concentrate on the conversation. We met up for drinks at The Garden. He’s fifo so back to work today and then going back to Ireland for 3 weeks. He seems very lovely and really laid back, nothing phases him. And at the end of the date he gave me his number and said he hopes we can catch up again.
There’s the update for the weekend…To Be Continued!!!
Hope you had a great weekend!
xx
MAX
Good HEAVENS I must have been drinking if I called the boy a 'slut', but go me.
JESUS WEPT he replied 'Perhaps' to your very blatant come-on? What the hell kind of human is he? That is ridiculous. He's not slut material. Sluts are ready to cycle to your house at midnight to be totes dirty. That boy has a LONG way to go.
Matt ... well ... we shall reserve judgement until we put him through the 'slut' hoops. hehehe.
GO.
FOR.
BRIAN.
CAS
Yes, you said I must have a ‘slut’ on the side!
Brian, I can’t, just not that into him! I don’t think I could be with a fifo dude and he even said that it’s really hard to make work.
I’m putting it out to the universe for Matt to get his shit together!
MAX
I am disgusting. Never listen to me. Except really DO listen to me, but only secretly.
CAS
Brian has just sent me a small video of him crushing rocks and is now back up on Wednesday and wants to catch up! Oh dear it’s always the ones you’re not as smitten with :-(
MAX
Title of new play
Crushing Rocks With Brian.
CAS
Bahaha, these boys are making it far too easy!
MAX
You know, my love, my advice is go for the keen, easy boys who actually turn up. Ease yourself into the game with men who make the time, take the effort and are actually dating you.
Leave the game players aside, no matter how cute. Treat yo'self and choose positive. If the sparks don't fly after date three, do the deed. But at least give them a chance!
Says Max, who exclusively hangs out with boys who cycle over to her house at midnight to be dirty.
BUT, I spend a very slow and leisurely year letting Priest chase me, so, whatevs, I totes know what I am talking about.
CAS
I love that piece of advice xx
Hello my love,
Happy Monday!
So, I took your advice and contacted my ‘slut’ on Saturday. We conversed for a bit and he said that he’d be finished work at 9.30, an invitation I asked? Perhaps was his remark. In the end I didn’t see him, it’s all too hard and I can’t be bothered.
Matt, we’ll I’ve asked him over twice now, Friday it just didn’t happen and then Saturday he didn’t finish until after 1pm, so I can forgive that. It’s just weird is all…
So anyhoos popped back on Tinder yesterday and was matched with a guy called Brian, who I later found out is irish, I was hoping that his accent would be crap, so I could at least concentrate on the conversation. We met up for drinks at The Garden. He’s fifo so back to work today and then going back to Ireland for 3 weeks. He seems very lovely and really laid back, nothing phases him. And at the end of the date he gave me his number and said he hopes we can catch up again.
There’s the update for the weekend…To Be Continued!!!
Hope you had a great weekend!
xx
MAX
Good HEAVENS I must have been drinking if I called the boy a 'slut', but go me.
JESUS WEPT he replied 'Perhaps' to your very blatant come-on? What the hell kind of human is he? That is ridiculous. He's not slut material. Sluts are ready to cycle to your house at midnight to be totes dirty. That boy has a LONG way to go.
Matt ... well ... we shall reserve judgement until we put him through the 'slut' hoops. hehehe.
GO.
FOR.
BRIAN.
CAS
Yes, you said I must have a ‘slut’ on the side!
Brian, I can’t, just not that into him! I don’t think I could be with a fifo dude and he even said that it’s really hard to make work.
I’m putting it out to the universe for Matt to get his shit together!
MAX
I am disgusting. Never listen to me. Except really DO listen to me, but only secretly.
CAS
Brian has just sent me a small video of him crushing rocks and is now back up on Wednesday and wants to catch up! Oh dear it’s always the ones you’re not as smitten with :-(
MAX
Title of new play
Crushing Rocks With Brian.
CAS
Bahaha, these boys are making it far too easy!
MAX
You know, my love, my advice is go for the keen, easy boys who actually turn up. Ease yourself into the game with men who make the time, take the effort and are actually dating you.
Leave the game players aside, no matter how cute. Treat yo'self and choose positive. If the sparks don't fly after date three, do the deed. But at least give them a chance!
Says Max, who exclusively hangs out with boys who cycle over to her house at midnight to be dirty.
BUT, I spend a very slow and leisurely year letting Priest chase me, so, whatevs, I totes know what I am talking about.
CAS
I love that piece of advice xx
2 November 2006
MAX
Oh
My
God
Have barely had three hours sleep. Not sure I *could* sleep in the next three days I am so wired.
UNBELIEVABLE night, utterly unbelievable. Just so you know, better than ALL the Avanti parties AND the Leeds party. I kid you NOT. You can even throw the last few Slug nights in and it still wouldn't reach the guilty pleasures of last night.
You are going to be SO friggin' proud of me.
The best bit ever, ever, ever? When 'I like the way you move' came on, he unbuttoned his shirt for me - and that was the second time in the night.
I don't need to sleep? SLEEP? Christ, I'd be wasting valuable remembering time.
JESUS CHRIST.
And I haven't even STARTED on the rest of the boys, who asked me out,
the random pickups ...
OH MY GOD.
BEING SOBER IS A WONDERFUL THING
To 13 friends, and that’s just half of the girls who got this email
Ladies
Thank you all variously for listening to me rabbit on and on and ON about my obsession with the young man in the last six weeks.
Last night the Final Year Dinner started at 5.30pm and kicked on until he, another girl and I were the last on the dancefloor at 3am this morning (please DO not ask where we were, I think you have ALL heard of the Hip-E Club, yes?)
In between was a party that was the perfect example of why I do not drink, NEVER has it paid off more to be sober: it beat the Rugby team, the Avanti parties, the Leeds party AND all the nights at the Slug and Lettuce into a whimpering heap.
The photos WILL be following, trust me, I won't be able to help myself.
Now I have to calm my over-simulated nerves - you have all seen me completely wired at one time or another, so you know how I am probably looking at the moment - and go to work and try to keep THAT grin off my face.
I just spent three hours trying to sleep and not dream ... what productivity lies ahead today!
Claire 'I got asked out by the wrong man last night, amongst other hilarious stories' Bowen
ROBBIE
all i can say is 'brilliant- absolutely brilliant!'
now to put yr paper behind u and then work on the boy ...
looking forward to the pictures … and the stories … and yr giggling ...
MAX
Photos attached!
There are two more cameras of photos that I need to get my hands on ... there is the photo of me and him together (two times only) on his camera and I want those photos goddamnit.
RHYS
Okay max - I have to admit, the previous photos of your lust did not serve him justice. But these ones certainly did. The clit tickler is a good look for him and the boy dresses well … bring on December :-)
MAX
8-) wow! you and Che both have said they can see what I am going on about now. Both of you are kinda hard to impress with men.
He drives me crazy *sigh* And it is no help that he is utterly charming and lovely. HE IS KILLING ME - and it would appear, all the other girls too :(
The thing about Wednesday night is that I am putting out the deadline of something happening to way past December. The only reason the night was successful for me was because I was the ONLY girl in that group not chasing him.
THE NIGHT
During dinner at the Royal Perth Yacht Club, I was squired around for five hours by Tad, the impossible crush.
On Wednesday his friend Megan would find us each hour and tell us we must stop flirting. He is an astonishing boy Rhys, so very gallant, a real gentleman.
Young man was well behaved and we were very discreet when we talked. Well, I was anyway. I had to walk away a few times to get him to shut up.
Then the party relocated to Niche and things hotted up. EVERY girl there was trying to pin young man down to picking one of them, and he was VERY good at keeping them all at exactly the same level, the 'he would if he could, but he's not, but keep hoping' level. The boy is very good, but there was still a catfight. Thankfully while that was happening I was being chatted up by the General Manager and PR Manager of the Ford Racing Team in town for the Rally. They tried to hire me to join their team for NZ!
While I was chatting away to the top blond Brit totty the boys were asking if I wanted a drink every five minutes. Then I introduced them to the two Brits and watch their eyes widen with respect. Heh. I am so evil, fast cars always impress young boys.
And the boys in the class? Well, they were after me. I was demanded in every photo and in the end I was getting kisses. THEN I was asked out and things got really interesting. The effect of new women in a close-knit group I think.
It was only yesterday when I was looking back at the photos and what I remembered that it struck me that young man and I had been in direct competition all night. He had the girls in the palm of his hand, I was working my way through a line of the boys. He talked to some girls that were NOT from the group and the girls glared. I talked to men who were not part of the group and I had a string of boys trying to cut in.
And then there was the shirt thing. I never stirred a foot in his direction all night, he had to come to me. And when he did he did various things that seem bizarre in the light of day, but were so
goddamn sexy at the time I was in pain:
#1 'Max, look, I was in the gym this morning, do you think it did any good?' proffers his fabulous arms for my touch - I refused.
#2 'Max, look, I don't have as much body hair as the boys over there' proffers his whole body for my inspection - I refused.
#3 Third time lucky he actually undid ALL the buttons on his shirt. I cannot for the life of me remember what prompted this impromptu floorshow for me, mainly because the sight of that chest wiped me out entirely. I couldn't look for fear of losing all brain function with lust.
#4 Second strip show in the middle of the Hip-E. This time I know what prompted it and, well, let's just say he acts on direct orders from me to strip. I was still unable to actually look when the chest appeared. Drooling is not very ladylike.
And then I started getting into my dancing groove and he was left to protect Megha and I from the Hip-E predators. Then we went to get kebabs and we went home - separately.
LESSON LEARNT
I am not stirring a foot towards him - it is imperative that I not chase him in any way - the only way I am going to even get into the race is to let him do ALL the moves. And I am pretty fine with that now that I have seen how he deals with girls. It's just something a boy that hot and lovely gets, so I have to make sure I manage him right.
So I am pretty much in for the long haul now. It's going to be an interesting summer! :)
Essays beckon!
TOM
you and him almost look like you could be brother and sister in that photo. Oops prob shouldnt have pointed that out, now you might get turned off a bit!!
hows the essay going? finished it yet?
RHYS
if only you could submit this as your essay *the email* ;-) This was a most enjoyable email to open up go through. hahah - I find it hard to believe that I am hard to impress :-P
All I can say is why wait until the end of summer for something you can enjoy now :-)
It was very amusing to see his little head appearing in all of the pictures … It would have been good for a topless picture to be emailed … something to work on there :-)
That was very amusing that Tad has a mini-you girlfriend. The question is though did he start dating her before or after meeting you....
I am enjoying hearing about my single friends love lifes
Enjoy your dancing … (I like that term)
MAX
Who is Who:
Him - the one *I* want
Goran - the one who asked me out
Stuart - from Brighton, apparently the boys love the fact that he 'fancies' me, Aussie boys have never heard that phrase ...
Dan - is an utter legend, here he is looking for boobs and not finding them on me!
Alex - VERY hot, very hot indeed.
Jonathon - nicknamed 'The Hess' by the boys, they say he is the boy that gets ALL the girls all the time.
Filip - SO hot I usually can't speak in his presence.
Tad - his girlfriend is a clone of me, needless to say we get along very well.
Put in your orders ...
MAX
:) How BIG is my grin?
What a great night!
Tad was definitely going out with Claire for AGES before he met me! They are off to Europe together in twenty days, bless 'em.
Alex came in today looking VERY fly to give me his photos and he was teasing me for 'getting around' with all the boys and I just looked very smug and oogled him when he wasn't looking - there are so many hot boys around at the moment *sigh* It's a hard life.
/-)
MAX
last update for your entertainment - and yes, I know they are jailbait *sigh*
RHYS
your grin is incredibly big.
I must say Bell - do not cut your hair, it has great feng shui going on at the moment and it really suits you with that length.
I must away - got a plane to catch and things to see.
xxooo speak to you upon my return.
MAX
HAVE A GREAT TIME DOLL! :)
OH
MY
GOD
I am so excited for you, business class, Europe - fark it is going to be so much fun! :)
I am LOVING myself SICK in the long hair, no cutting will be entered into at all.
REDHEADED FORMER CRUSH
hey babe
hows things? and now down to business...
quick question did you got to Turkey for Anzac day? if so did you use a tour operator? and which one?
MAX
THINGS ARE BRILLIANT! :)
Just got in at 3am after kicking on with the Civil Engineering Final Year students after their Final Year Dinner. Nothing like being comprehensively 'tuned' by 15 HOT 22 year olds in one night - it must be some kind of record or something - being admin has it's perks, oh yes.
I did go to Turkey for Anzac. I went with a Turkish tour group of Law students organised by the Turkish friends of my friend Kim. It was unreal, going with the Turks is fantastic. If you want an incredible experience, I can find out if Koray is running it again this year ...
Man, gotta go download my trophy photos and actually pretend to do work today - boys are such fun!
REDHEADED FORMER CRUSH
nice one! you dirty stop out, taking advantage of all those young boys, good on you! ha ha.
what else is happening at your end? we're al booked in for New Years in New York, cant wait! the weather has snapped cold, here comes winter! i love wearing coats and jackets!
yeah ask your friend about Anzac, that'd be cool, i might have a whole bunch of people (between 5-10), i really wont to avoid using those horrendous tour operators!
MAX
What else is new? Weeeeeell ...
You are the only boy getting to see these photos ... mainly because you were emailing me at the time of the biggest development in the saga :)
The story is that young man - the boy in most of the photos - is one of my students and has been chasing me, GOD knows why, for about four months now. I have been a GOOD girl and kept my hands off him though.
All my girlfriends have heard the stories, and this little album was created from photos from the Wednesday night Final Year Dinner so they could see who I have been obsessed with keeping calm around for the last four months.
New Years in New York - hell that will be a party!
I will see if I can get you in touch with the boys in Turkey ...
Max 'Grabby McHotyoungbuns' Bell
REDHEADED FORMER CRUSH
is it just me or does this young man look like Shannon Noll circa Australian Idol?
MAX
*cue hysterical laughter*
Yup. That is his nickname in his class, in the class below him, and the class below THAT.
My girlfriends call him Blair from Neighbours/Big Brother.
I just call him HOTTIE.
REDHEADED FORMER CRUSH
oh yeah blair for sure! ha ha you craddle snatcher! i bet your teaching him all kinds of things.
MAX
bless yer - not yet! He is still covered by duty of care *damn*
I am angling to teach him stuff! :)
and cradlesnatching is ALL the rage right now. If Demi and Cameron are doing it ..?
MAX
First picture
Goran – the one who asked me out. He was the only sober one last night as he was driving. I don't know what to think about it, he would be great to date, knows how to treat a girl. Croatian. Very Eastern European Mafia *shrug* it would be good for a nice dinner!
Tad – the one with the lovely girlfriend called Claire *sigh* He is utterly lovely that boy. He was such a gentleman all night. I have an unfulfillable crush on him.
Matt – oh my GOD did we bond last night. Amazing boy, I hope we get to be Queens buddies.
Second picture
Jonathon – the Saffa who reads the same Fantasy Books as me, the boys were SOOOOO nervous each time he came near me!
Third picture
Him. Yes. The man is hawt.
Filip is the one next to Tim. I can't speak to Filip without tuning out his inane chatter and just oozing all over his chest. Incredible body.
Fourth picture
Some predatory slapper out for all the top totty she could get her wandering hands on! :)
Great night. Hopefully more pictorial evidence of Max and young men coming my way via the boys ...
Hope you are having a good day and are not too tired
ROBBIE
hya- had a quick look at the pics at your final year dinner- i must say your lad looks shockingly like Blair from Neighbours (who was 'discovered' on the 1st season of that crapola show Big Brother). Anyway- looks like YOU Max had a ball- perhaps more to be had in due time … wink wink.
As for the slapper that's after him- if she's a friend of yours I apologise ahead of time, but as she is no friend of mine, I can say in all honesty that she be right at home at the stables … neigh.
love robbie (who only like babies of the non-human kind)
MAX
*grin*
Just shows our ages really Robbie - we think Blair from Neighbours, his classmates call him Shannon Noll.
I did have a ball actually - nothing like acres of 22 year olds trying to snog you. Not to mention the HOT British PR manager of the Ford Racing Team (in town for the Rally) with his East London geezer accent. 'So, will you stop talking if I snog you' in that accent is SO effective!
Ah, she is not a slapper, she is just young and silly :)
M
Ummm....
Would I be the first person to make the Shannon Noll connection? I just can't help myself, every time I see that little piece of half-fuzz :)
I mean ... LOOK: http://www.shannonnoll.com.au
Eh? Eh???
*nudges you*
Maybe he's signed up to ASIO in the last round of recruitment and his cover is that of an Irish engineering student nestled deep in the hotbed of dissent that is UWA.
I think I'm on to something here, I really do.
Thing is, though, looking through the photos it seems that you have your pick of guys there - swimming in them, you are. If I sent you a photo of the men that I work with, you'd lose your lunch. Office of over 500 staff - not a handsome one in sight, not even if you drink quite a bit and squint furiously.
MAX
*grin*
Amongst the girls, it is a dead heat between Shannon Noll and Blair from Neighbours / Big Brother. I think it is pretty funny actually because I wouldn't know Shannon Noll if I fell over him, so I really can't see it.
Your lack of handsome men, even after two lots of beer goggles one on top of another, is pretty sad luv. I had ALL the boys in to say a sheepish hello this week and DAMN they are fine lads.
Want to know something mortifying though? I showed Elbow some photos last night and she saw the attached photos and gave a shriek ... she immediately recognised one of them, Trinity classmate of Timbon and Cathedral Choirboy whom Elbow and I have known since he was about 8. Problem is the last time I saw Choirboy was when he was fourteen, and because I was not Elbow and did not have a crush on him, I never knew his name.
I was speechless with horror - all those pecks on the cheek, the vaguely saucy emails in the last week, OH MY GOD I'M CORRUPTING A CHOIRBOY! And even worse, I am *sure* he knows who I am. Gawd. I tell you what, I am going to that SPECIAL, SPECIAL hell.
I'm not sure I should even go to work tomorrow, things are getting stupid :(
I hope you are having just normal, non-jailbait times this week ...
Oh
My
God
Have barely had three hours sleep. Not sure I *could* sleep in the next three days I am so wired.
UNBELIEVABLE night, utterly unbelievable. Just so you know, better than ALL the Avanti parties AND the Leeds party. I kid you NOT. You can even throw the last few Slug nights in and it still wouldn't reach the guilty pleasures of last night.
You are going to be SO friggin' proud of me.
The best bit ever, ever, ever? When 'I like the way you move' came on, he unbuttoned his shirt for me - and that was the second time in the night.
I don't need to sleep? SLEEP? Christ, I'd be wasting valuable remembering time.
JESUS CHRIST.
And I haven't even STARTED on the rest of the boys, who asked me out,
the random pickups ...
OH MY GOD.
BEING SOBER IS A WONDERFUL THING
To 13 friends, and that’s just half of the girls who got this email
Ladies
Thank you all variously for listening to me rabbit on and on and ON about my obsession with the young man in the last six weeks.
Last night the Final Year Dinner started at 5.30pm and kicked on until he, another girl and I were the last on the dancefloor at 3am this morning (please DO not ask where we were, I think you have ALL heard of the Hip-E Club, yes?)
In between was a party that was the perfect example of why I do not drink, NEVER has it paid off more to be sober: it beat the Rugby team, the Avanti parties, the Leeds party AND all the nights at the Slug and Lettuce into a whimpering heap.
The photos WILL be following, trust me, I won't be able to help myself.
Now I have to calm my over-simulated nerves - you have all seen me completely wired at one time or another, so you know how I am probably looking at the moment - and go to work and try to keep THAT grin off my face.
I just spent three hours trying to sleep and not dream ... what productivity lies ahead today!
Claire 'I got asked out by the wrong man last night, amongst other hilarious stories' Bowen
ROBBIE
all i can say is 'brilliant- absolutely brilliant!'
now to put yr paper behind u and then work on the boy ...
looking forward to the pictures … and the stories … and yr giggling ...
MAX
Photos attached!
There are two more cameras of photos that I need to get my hands on ... there is the photo of me and him together (two times only) on his camera and I want those photos goddamnit.
RHYS
Okay max - I have to admit, the previous photos of your lust did not serve him justice. But these ones certainly did. The clit tickler is a good look for him and the boy dresses well … bring on December :-)
MAX
8-) wow! you and Che both have said they can see what I am going on about now. Both of you are kinda hard to impress with men.
He drives me crazy *sigh* And it is no help that he is utterly charming and lovely. HE IS KILLING ME - and it would appear, all the other girls too :(
The thing about Wednesday night is that I am putting out the deadline of something happening to way past December. The only reason the night was successful for me was because I was the ONLY girl in that group not chasing him.
THE NIGHT
During dinner at the Royal Perth Yacht Club, I was squired around for five hours by Tad, the impossible crush.
On Wednesday his friend Megan would find us each hour and tell us we must stop flirting. He is an astonishing boy Rhys, so very gallant, a real gentleman.
Young man was well behaved and we were very discreet when we talked. Well, I was anyway. I had to walk away a few times to get him to shut up.
Then the party relocated to Niche and things hotted up. EVERY girl there was trying to pin young man down to picking one of them, and he was VERY good at keeping them all at exactly the same level, the 'he would if he could, but he's not, but keep hoping' level. The boy is very good, but there was still a catfight. Thankfully while that was happening I was being chatted up by the General Manager and PR Manager of the Ford Racing Team in town for the Rally. They tried to hire me to join their team for NZ!
While I was chatting away to the top blond Brit totty the boys were asking if I wanted a drink every five minutes. Then I introduced them to the two Brits and watch their eyes widen with respect. Heh. I am so evil, fast cars always impress young boys.
And the boys in the class? Well, they were after me. I was demanded in every photo and in the end I was getting kisses. THEN I was asked out and things got really interesting. The effect of new women in a close-knit group I think.
It was only yesterday when I was looking back at the photos and what I remembered that it struck me that young man and I had been in direct competition all night. He had the girls in the palm of his hand, I was working my way through a line of the boys. He talked to some girls that were NOT from the group and the girls glared. I talked to men who were not part of the group and I had a string of boys trying to cut in.
And then there was the shirt thing. I never stirred a foot in his direction all night, he had to come to me. And when he did he did various things that seem bizarre in the light of day, but were so
goddamn sexy at the time I was in pain:
#1 'Max, look, I was in the gym this morning, do you think it did any good?' proffers his fabulous arms for my touch - I refused.
#2 'Max, look, I don't have as much body hair as the boys over there' proffers his whole body for my inspection - I refused.
#3 Third time lucky he actually undid ALL the buttons on his shirt. I cannot for the life of me remember what prompted this impromptu floorshow for me, mainly because the sight of that chest wiped me out entirely. I couldn't look for fear of losing all brain function with lust.
#4 Second strip show in the middle of the Hip-E. This time I know what prompted it and, well, let's just say he acts on direct orders from me to strip. I was still unable to actually look when the chest appeared. Drooling is not very ladylike.
And then I started getting into my dancing groove and he was left to protect Megha and I from the Hip-E predators. Then we went to get kebabs and we went home - separately.
LESSON LEARNT
I am not stirring a foot towards him - it is imperative that I not chase him in any way - the only way I am going to even get into the race is to let him do ALL the moves. And I am pretty fine with that now that I have seen how he deals with girls. It's just something a boy that hot and lovely gets, so I have to make sure I manage him right.
So I am pretty much in for the long haul now. It's going to be an interesting summer! :)
Essays beckon!
TOM
you and him almost look like you could be brother and sister in that photo. Oops prob shouldnt have pointed that out, now you might get turned off a bit!!
hows the essay going? finished it yet?
RHYS
if only you could submit this as your essay *the email* ;-) This was a most enjoyable email to open up go through. hahah - I find it hard to believe that I am hard to impress :-P
All I can say is why wait until the end of summer for something you can enjoy now :-)
It was very amusing to see his little head appearing in all of the pictures … It would have been good for a topless picture to be emailed … something to work on there :-)
That was very amusing that Tad has a mini-you girlfriend. The question is though did he start dating her before or after meeting you....
I am enjoying hearing about my single friends love lifes
Enjoy your dancing … (I like that term)
MAX
Who is Who:
Him - the one *I* want
Goran - the one who asked me out
Stuart - from Brighton, apparently the boys love the fact that he 'fancies' me, Aussie boys have never heard that phrase ...
Dan - is an utter legend, here he is looking for boobs and not finding them on me!
Alex - VERY hot, very hot indeed.
Jonathon - nicknamed 'The Hess' by the boys, they say he is the boy that gets ALL the girls all the time.
Filip - SO hot I usually can't speak in his presence.
Tad - his girlfriend is a clone of me, needless to say we get along very well.
Put in your orders ...
MAX
:) How BIG is my grin?
What a great night!
Tad was definitely going out with Claire for AGES before he met me! They are off to Europe together in twenty days, bless 'em.
Alex came in today looking VERY fly to give me his photos and he was teasing me for 'getting around' with all the boys and I just looked very smug and oogled him when he wasn't looking - there are so many hot boys around at the moment *sigh* It's a hard life.
/-)
MAX
last update for your entertainment - and yes, I know they are jailbait *sigh*
RHYS
your grin is incredibly big.
I must say Bell - do not cut your hair, it has great feng shui going on at the moment and it really suits you with that length.
I must away - got a plane to catch and things to see.
xxooo speak to you upon my return.
MAX
HAVE A GREAT TIME DOLL! :)
OH
MY
GOD
I am so excited for you, business class, Europe - fark it is going to be so much fun! :)
I am LOVING myself SICK in the long hair, no cutting will be entered into at all.
REDHEADED FORMER CRUSH
hey babe
hows things? and now down to business...
quick question did you got to Turkey for Anzac day? if so did you use a tour operator? and which one?
MAX
THINGS ARE BRILLIANT! :)
Just got in at 3am after kicking on with the Civil Engineering Final Year students after their Final Year Dinner. Nothing like being comprehensively 'tuned' by 15 HOT 22 year olds in one night - it must be some kind of record or something - being admin has it's perks, oh yes.
I did go to Turkey for Anzac. I went with a Turkish tour group of Law students organised by the Turkish friends of my friend Kim. It was unreal, going with the Turks is fantastic. If you want an incredible experience, I can find out if Koray is running it again this year ...
Man, gotta go download my trophy photos and actually pretend to do work today - boys are such fun!
REDHEADED FORMER CRUSH
nice one! you dirty stop out, taking advantage of all those young boys, good on you! ha ha.
what else is happening at your end? we're al booked in for New Years in New York, cant wait! the weather has snapped cold, here comes winter! i love wearing coats and jackets!
yeah ask your friend about Anzac, that'd be cool, i might have a whole bunch of people (between 5-10), i really wont to avoid using those horrendous tour operators!
MAX
What else is new? Weeeeeell ...
You are the only boy getting to see these photos ... mainly because you were emailing me at the time of the biggest development in the saga :)
The story is that young man - the boy in most of the photos - is one of my students and has been chasing me, GOD knows why, for about four months now. I have been a GOOD girl and kept my hands off him though.
All my girlfriends have heard the stories, and this little album was created from photos from the Wednesday night Final Year Dinner so they could see who I have been obsessed with keeping calm around for the last four months.
New Years in New York - hell that will be a party!
I will see if I can get you in touch with the boys in Turkey ...
Max 'Grabby McHotyoungbuns' Bell
REDHEADED FORMER CRUSH
is it just me or does this young man look like Shannon Noll circa Australian Idol?
MAX
*cue hysterical laughter*
Yup. That is his nickname in his class, in the class below him, and the class below THAT.
My girlfriends call him Blair from Neighbours/Big Brother.
I just call him HOTTIE.
REDHEADED FORMER CRUSH
oh yeah blair for sure! ha ha you craddle snatcher! i bet your teaching him all kinds of things.
MAX
bless yer - not yet! He is still covered by duty of care *damn*
I am angling to teach him stuff! :)
and cradlesnatching is ALL the rage right now. If Demi and Cameron are doing it ..?
MAX
First picture
Goran – the one who asked me out. He was the only sober one last night as he was driving. I don't know what to think about it, he would be great to date, knows how to treat a girl. Croatian. Very Eastern European Mafia *shrug* it would be good for a nice dinner!
Tad – the one with the lovely girlfriend called Claire *sigh* He is utterly lovely that boy. He was such a gentleman all night. I have an unfulfillable crush on him.
Matt – oh my GOD did we bond last night. Amazing boy, I hope we get to be Queens buddies.
Second picture
Jonathon – the Saffa who reads the same Fantasy Books as me, the boys were SOOOOO nervous each time he came near me!
Third picture
Him. Yes. The man is hawt.
Filip is the one next to Tim. I can't speak to Filip without tuning out his inane chatter and just oozing all over his chest. Incredible body.
Fourth picture
Some predatory slapper out for all the top totty she could get her wandering hands on! :)
Great night. Hopefully more pictorial evidence of Max and young men coming my way via the boys ...
Hope you are having a good day and are not too tired
ROBBIE
hya- had a quick look at the pics at your final year dinner- i must say your lad looks shockingly like Blair from Neighbours (who was 'discovered' on the 1st season of that crapola show Big Brother). Anyway- looks like YOU Max had a ball- perhaps more to be had in due time … wink wink.
As for the slapper that's after him- if she's a friend of yours I apologise ahead of time, but as she is no friend of mine, I can say in all honesty that she be right at home at the stables … neigh.
love robbie (who only like babies of the non-human kind)
MAX
*grin*
Just shows our ages really Robbie - we think Blair from Neighbours, his classmates call him Shannon Noll.
I did have a ball actually - nothing like acres of 22 year olds trying to snog you. Not to mention the HOT British PR manager of the Ford Racing Team (in town for the Rally) with his East London geezer accent. 'So, will you stop talking if I snog you' in that accent is SO effective!
Ah, she is not a slapper, she is just young and silly :)
M
Ummm....
Would I be the first person to make the Shannon Noll connection? I just can't help myself, every time I see that little piece of half-fuzz :)
I mean ... LOOK: http://www.shannonnoll.com.au
Eh? Eh???
*nudges you*
Maybe he's signed up to ASIO in the last round of recruitment and his cover is that of an Irish engineering student nestled deep in the hotbed of dissent that is UWA.
I think I'm on to something here, I really do.
Thing is, though, looking through the photos it seems that you have your pick of guys there - swimming in them, you are. If I sent you a photo of the men that I work with, you'd lose your lunch. Office of over 500 staff - not a handsome one in sight, not even if you drink quite a bit and squint furiously.
MAX
*grin*
Amongst the girls, it is a dead heat between Shannon Noll and Blair from Neighbours / Big Brother. I think it is pretty funny actually because I wouldn't know Shannon Noll if I fell over him, so I really can't see it.
Your lack of handsome men, even after two lots of beer goggles one on top of another, is pretty sad luv. I had ALL the boys in to say a sheepish hello this week and DAMN they are fine lads.
Want to know something mortifying though? I showed Elbow some photos last night and she saw the attached photos and gave a shriek ... she immediately recognised one of them, Trinity classmate of Timbon and Cathedral Choirboy whom Elbow and I have known since he was about 8. Problem is the last time I saw Choirboy was when he was fourteen, and because I was not Elbow and did not have a crush on him, I never knew his name.
I was speechless with horror - all those pecks on the cheek, the vaguely saucy emails in the last week, OH MY GOD I'M CORRUPTING A CHOIRBOY! And even worse, I am *sure* he knows who I am. Gawd. I tell you what, I am going to that SPECIAL, SPECIAL hell.
I'm not sure I should even go to work tomorrow, things are getting stupid :(
I hope you are having just normal, non-jailbait times this week ...
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