4 December 2013

MAX
so, not tonight then :(

KIM

I'm not sure if there was any text to that besides the subject?

But are you still available for this evening? What's all this nonsense about confirmation and notice. I said yes and put you in my calendar. That's basically biblical!

I booked a table for two at 353 for 1800 this evening. Does that sound alright? It looks like an interesting place and I need to make tracks into Wembley tonight for a leaving the country party for a friend.

MAX

Alas, you did not tell me you had said yes and put me in your calendar :) I'm good, but I am not the NSA I'm afraid. Are we getting some Vulcan mind-meld for the ruling of the universe gig or will we just have an army of Personal Assistants with their own Personal Assistants?

KIM

I said yes in the email - therefore it was a yes and went into my calendar.

I think Vulcan mind-melding will be an important tool to take advantage of but many layers of PA-caption will also be required. Both for organisational purposes, excuse purposes and protection of course.

MAX

*wail* but I don't have an email in reply to mine! It's either in the intertubes or in my spam because I definitely got no reply in my inbox
:(

http://www.fanpop.com/clubs/the-daily-show/videos/3482/title/senator-stevens-internet-series-tubes

Nevermind, I have persuaded my brother to take the babysitting gig (not too hard, we both love our cousins) and I will be at 353 Cambridge at 6pm for dinner :)

KIM

See below, highlighted text :P You definitely need a PA. Glad you could re-arrange the babysitting :)

MAX

cool, I didn't miss an email.

So, I am guessing you don't have a PA :) I am, of course, an Executive Assistant of ten years experience.

You did not reply to my email, therefore there was no confirmation to me.

Your previous email to me proposing days I could pick from was not a confirmation to my email saying which would suit me since, you know, it had been sent before my response :)

*wink* take it from the professional PA, a quick 'Wednesday it is, I'll confirm details closer to the time' was all the confirmation needed to close the deal.

Next time we'll do better, we have to get our A Game up for galaxy-wide domination.

KIM

Roger roger. I took yours as a confirmation. But I will know better for next time. Unfortunately no PA for me, they don't like provided them for those about to leave the company... Maybe I should just get a PA so I don't have to learn to do better prior to universal domination.

MAX

hehehe.

I would advocate making sure you understand your PA's job so that if they don't do it right, you will know it before the shit hits the fan :)

Nothing worse for an aspiring dictator than watching someone in power get deposed because they didn't know what their minions were doing … I always wonder how they got into power in the first place if they didn't work up through the roles that were supporting them. Classic story of managers who had never actually managed anything.

No, wiser to be better at your minions' jobs than the minion, so the terror of your eye falling across them is real and ever-present ...

I just cannot wait to be King ...

KIM

Good point. I'll be sure to master many roles. Though this could put a slight delay on the move to dictatorship if I need to spend years mastering other skills...

MAX

*cough* you do not need to be master of all, just be better than MINIONS that work for you.

you will, of course, have actual MASTERS to oversee operations that you have no interest in. And their heads will roll if their minions misbehave. They should not get the job unless they are better than their minions.

but for one's own operations, one should definitely be better than the minions. Not that being better than the minions is hard for ones such as us *wink*

KIM

Ah, I like that thinking. Duly noted, my Supreme Overlord of Earth

MAX

Well, you know, I have to keep making sure I am head of the pack … if I am not at the head of the pack, my life is minionless ...

BOOM!

KIM

Wow...

MAX

Yes :) It's a gift.

KIM

I finally understand how you became a writer.

MAX

People pleaded with me to pick on strangers, not on them as long suffering friends and family.

I did it to save people ...

KIM

Hahaha. But picking on friends and family is so much more fun!

MAX

But, there are a LOT more strangers in the world than friends and family.

Therefore, once I am in the public sphere, exponentially more fun to be plundered

You are plunder from the public sphere ...

KIM

Do they still count as strangers once you are all powerful dictator of them?

MAX

Now there is a question.

I can imagine I would be a less murderous Shahryar, a new person brought to eat a meal with me each lunchtime and they must laugh gaily at my jokes and tell me marvelous stories so as to become friends with me, and be spared the pitilessness of being a stranger to the Supreme Dictator …

MAX
let me just rearrange some things

sorry, sorry, I just went outside to check my texts (I don't get coverage in the office) and I hadn't heard from you!

I was asked to do some babysitting of my cousins and I said yes and I just have to make sure my brother can do it ...

:)

MAX
not cross, just in the middle of organising things, as I know you are ...

... and I am always paranoid that I miss emails because sometimes I open them on my phone and then miss them when on the computer :(

I was looking forward to seeing you and having a chat, but I knew you had things to organise, so I was going to let you do your thing.

I have things to do also that would not be disrupted by getting another night free, so I made sure I was gliding along with other things (playwriting) to do in case you had to cancel.

:)

KIM

Fair enough.

You have an interesting way of writing emails, utilising the subject line as you do.

I have a great 'Flushed' related story I probably shouldn't share with you tonight!

MAX
RE: re: FWD: [restricted] re: THIS is HILLLLARIOUS! Don't stop it now

Ah, in the good old days before gmail needed similar subject lines to group emails, my friends and I had elaborate and delightful games with our subjects - entire weeks of emails would be composed under subjects that were poems when collected together, or runs of puns, or completely incorrect indications of contents or elaborate private jokes.

:)

I like to start the email in the subject because I like it to be personal as soon as you see the snippet on your phone or on the computer ...

KIM

Hmmm, I may well have deleted emails with subject lines such as this if I were to receive them unsolicited or unexpected. Though those games do sound fun.

MAX
dear dove kim you have won 35 OOO OOO OOO in Euro MILLIONS

I agree :)